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Lightning bolts out her ass
News Corporation | Submitted by: Filibuster Indabutt
"A woman has suffered severe burning to her anus after being struck by lightning which hit her in the mouth and passed right through her body."
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From: brainspore [Brainspore]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 15:41
Huh. It's been a while since I studied physics, but I'd have thought the electricity would have taken the path down one of her legs. Maybe she'll get some kind of super-powers as a consolation prize.
From: reader57 [Rotten Reader]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 15:55
Well, the only thing I can say is: SHIT FIRE
From: dirtyslut76
[slut]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:12
'She was wearing rubber bathroom shoes at the time and so instead of earthing through her feet it appears the electricity shot out of her backside," a medic told local television news channel, 24.' ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Oh, this is too funny. I can't believe she is giving interviews about how lightning came out her anus.
From: gargoyle1
Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:19
I'd love to see this on video. Damn that's gotta hurt, makes my sphincter pucker just thinking about it. Fucking OUCH!
From: dirtyslut76
[slut]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:22
Speaking of "Ring of Fire", I heard Johnny Cash was approached years ago by a hemmoroid company to buy the rights to use that sound in their commercial, LOL.
From: newfierose
[bON]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:30
From: dirtyslut76 [slut] Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:22 Speaking of "Ring of Fire", I heard Johnny Cash was approached years ago by a hemmoroid company to buy the rights to use that sound in their commercial, LOL Johnny Cash must be rolling in his grave then because here in Toronto they had a radio commercial back in the summer of 2002 for a hemmroid company and they played Ring of Fire in the jingle..LOL Poor Johnny and poor chicky with her burnt out ass. I'm not the slipper/rubber shoe wearing type around the house guess Id be dead if I were in her "shoes"
From: studgerbil
[Stud]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:32
 Famed Backyard wrestler "Mister Anus" Sorry, can't find a pic of Ace Lightning, who lost a famous backyard match to Mr Anus. But anyway, that's what happens when you bring lightning to an anus fight. DS -- the rumor is half true. None other than Frank Zappa met Johnny Cash before a 1988 concert in Wurzburg, Germany and tried to get him onstage to perform "Ring of Fire" with the band. Johnny declined, but Zappa put on a performance of the tune anyway, complete an Anusol reference.
From: lordpakul [Lord Pakul]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:32
This is a cunning cover story. The fact is that she's been taking a demonic dong up the bum: Sylvine de la Paline, aged twenty-three, condemned to be burned by the Parlement of Paris in 1616, described her experiences: "The devil had known her once before, and his member was like that of a horse, and on insertion it was as cold as ice and ejected ice-cold semen, and on his withdrawing it burned her as if it had been on fire." - from Robbins' Encyclopedia of Witchcraft and Demonology http://www.yankeeclassic.com/miskatonic/dmetaphysics/papers/magic/sexmagi3.htm 
From: kermie62
[steven]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 16:58
(I dont get this picture, what do the men tied to the stakes have erections or are they flat chested women riding the pony
From: omagoch [Bryan]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 17:26
Anyone have that video of the kids playing warcraft or whatever it is? Lightning bolt!! Lightning bolt!! Lightning bolt!! It wouldn't so nerdy is that kid shot them out of his ass.
From: dadofautism [*****]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 18:41
There is just way too much funny stuff in here. But It doesn't list a city, and given the woman's name, it could be a translated reprint from somewhere slavic, or just plain untrue. But still friggin' funny, talk about applied science, 9th grade earth science class. Or when Cartman had the lightning coming out of his ass, or was thqat a satillite dish?
From: ferret [Honkey Kong]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 19:02
If indeed she develops the ability to generate lightning from her anus, then it is reasonable to assume that somebody penetrating two fingers in her pink and one in her stink will learn a new definition of "The Shocker" 
From: badfingers [Fuck That]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 19:18
Could you imagine if it blew out her pussy instead?! HOLY SHIT, thats gotta hurt the ol turd cutter. FUCK ME OUCH.
From: scrivner99 [scrivner_99]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 19:39
So, remember kids, always wear your rubber bathroom shoes and stand near the wet shower curtain when putting your mouth on the faucet during a lightning storm.
From: lordpakul [Lord Pakul]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 20:01
kermie62 , The painting depicts Burning of the Heretics (Auto-da-fé) by the Inquisition. The two heretics are attached to the stakes at the neck and groin. If they confessed, they may be strangled before being burned. http://www.wga.hu/html/b/berrugue/pedro/dominic.html http://www.rotten.com/library/history/inquisition/ 
From: herbmorrison [HerbMorrison]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 20:21
Is it warped that my first thought, aside from "ow," was to question whether she'd ever be up for anal again after this?
From: nativeamerigoth
[name? what name?]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 20:43
Are you kidding DS? She'll be on Leno singing "Ring of Fire" before you know it. **************************************************************************** She can't, she'll get sued for copyright infringement. Did you read about that one little ways before this?
From: acrimony
[Room Dz-015]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 21:00
Wow, that's a bitch. Well, guess we can learn two things from this: 1) Having your GI tract get flushed with things isn't all it's cracked up to be, and 2) ALWAYS wear shoes while brushing your teeth.
From: ferret [Honkey Kong]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 21:38
On the closely related topic of Ass............ Ryan Star has the most perfect ass I've ever seen in all of my 17+ years of pornography addiction. Sadly, she made only 7 movies and then left the San Fernando Valley; presumably forever.    
From: assgasms [A$$gasms]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 21:43
Come on.. How can I possibly be the first to link to this? 
From: scarshapedstar [scarshapedstar]
Date: 10-Oct-2006 22:10
(Insert limerick involving brass balls here.)
From: kermie62
[steven]
Date: 11-Oct-2006 02:12
Sorry Lord Paul That still doesnt explain the knobs at groin level. Did they nail them to the stake?. DOesnt look like any knots I've ever seen
From: nynmpseudo [Nynm Pseudo]
Date: 11-Oct-2006 06:37
I waited to read the posts and hoped someone else would ask this and get an answer, but since no one else has...... How would you wipe after that?
From: powderedtoastman
[Michael]
Date: 11-Oct-2006 06:41
I'm not a doctor but I guess with rectal injuries like that, they will perform a colostomy and give you a colostomy bag for the time being until everything has healed up nicely down there. So in other words, no wiping for her now, all she does is change the full bag.
From: nynmpseudo [Nynm Pseudo]
Date: 11-Oct-2006 06:49
powderedtoastman: No wiping? Just a bag? OK. I am going to try not to think about this anymore. Thank you.
From: primus [big hair]
Date: 11-Oct-2006 07:40
I was taught never to put my mouth on the faucet, to always use a glass. Now I know why.
From: mensanator [Slayer of the Mensa]
Date: 11-Oct-2006 09:10
(Insert limerick involving brass balls here.) --------------------------------------------- A fellow from Lexington, Mass. Had fabulous balls made of brass. But he'd wrap them in leather In bouts of bad weather Lest lightning shoot out of his ass.
From: andreama [Frankie]
Date: 12-Oct-2006 02:00
This reminds me of a juvenile conversation I had back in the day with some loud-mouth drunk dude, who brought up the idea of lighting up bottle rockets before sticking them up someones ass - and preferably his if it was up to me. By the way, lighting your "passing gases" on fire is not a myth - although it has been documented to burn up your insides, so I'd reccomend trying it on someone, anyone besides yourself - or particularly on the slob that does it just to get his laughfs at the expense of others.
Updated: 17-Oct-2006 13:19
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