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Jump, Fatass!
WGAL | Submitted by: NekoTurk
"A man wearing a parachute has been arrested after being pulled off the outside edge of the Empire State Building by New York City police who had been tipped off to the stunt." ... "Police said the 30-year-old man got into the building wearing a wig and a professional fat suit, worth thousands of dollars. The parachute was hidden underneath." ... Also: Sewage Spews From Toilet, Coats Home In Sludge
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From: abuser76 [Tom Smith]
Date: 1-May-2006 12:21
First bitches finally, a place in the sun
From: iguanac64 [Itchy Carter]
Date: 1-May-2006 12:25
Story#1 - Can't argue that this guy isn't spontaneous or is boring =) Story#2 - This is the exact same story from a week or two ago...NO MORE POT FOR DUDER!
From: brainspore [Brainspore]
Date: 1-May-2006 12:27
People have GOT to stop tipping off the police about these kinds of things. Successful or no, this guy jumping from the top of the Empire State would have been totally awesome. And where did he hide the chute? Up his big, fat ASS.
From: scumbagjunkie
[junkiescumbag]
Date: 1-May-2006 12:36
From: iguanac64 [Itchy Carter] Date: 1-May-2006 12:25 Story#2 - This is the exact same story from a week or two ago. ============================================================================== Is it? I was beginning to freak out that this was turning into some sort of trend.
From: theallseeingear [Bavid Dyrden]
Date: 1-May-2006 13:00
That is SO passé. Myself, I would try to wash the outside windows on an airplane.
From: antinomianist
[AERDNA]
Date: 1-May-2006 13:02
From: brainspore [Brainspore] Date: 1-May-2006 12:27 People have GOT to stop tipping off the police about these kinds of things. Successful or no, this guy jumping from the top of the Empire State would have been totally awesome. ===== Personally I'd find the unsucessful jump that much more awesome...especially if someone could manage some sort of up close footage of facial expressions...
From: dynahunk
[DynaHunk]
Date: 1-May-2006 13:13
And just how can we be sure this isn't simply a publicity stunt to announce Rosie O'Donnell's joining The View? "Man" in a "wig" and "fat suit," indeed!
From: niggerusmaximus [N. Maximus]
Date: 1-May-2006 13:21
brainspore, If this person want to fall to his death, he can knock himself out, but when he ends up falling and killing someone he lands on thats were the police need to intervene. Actually no they dont. Given the type of wind tunnels you get in that area jumping with a parachute strikes me as incredibly stupid.
From: gargoyle1
Date: 1-May-2006 13:35
Shoulda let him jump, then the article would have been so much more rotten. Love to see his ass splattered all over the sidewalk. Article #2 is a duplicate, yawn.
From: brainspore [Brainspore]
Date: 1-May-2006 13:57
From: niggerusmaximus [N. Maximus]
Date: 1-May-2006 13:21
brainspore,
If this person want to fall to his death, he can knock himself out, but when he ends up falling and killing someone he lands on thats were the police need to intervene. Actually no they dont. Given the type of wind tunnels you get in that area jumping with a parachute strikes me as incredibly stupid. Yeah, I wasn't serious. I know sucks in real life when people are killed by suicides. I think at least one person was killed by someone jumping from the flames at the WTC. But I still give the fake fatty props for sheer balls, if not for brains.
From: misterjeff [(actually it's Steve)]
Date: 1-May-2006 15:22
"City officials said they'll gut, repair, and clean up the house." Me, I'd rather they blowtorched it down to the ground and then block off the yard and fill it in full of bleach, like a moat. Then I'd sue them so they would rebuild the house.
From: mcgyver [Steve]
Date: 1-May-2006 16:28
If he jumped wearing the fat suit, i would be interested to know if the chute didn't open how high would he bounce?
From: sirbutlust
[mike duff]
Date: 1-May-2006 18:03
it is very suspicious when a fat person wants to go to the top of the empire state building. every fat person in the area i know is either too lazy, afraid of elevators, or figures there is no food up there. plus they stick out like a sore thumb around the usual unsuspicious arab visitors who visit with video cameras and notebooks.
From: easygirl
[cheryl]
Date: 2-May-2006 11:36
This is more common than you think the Iranian hot dog vendors usually scrape up any remains and some tourist is having a delicious dog with onions and mustard before the cops arrive (they are very efficient).
From: todesengel187 [Danzil Kitano]
Date: 2-May-2006 14:30
When I lived in Oakland, CA 3 years back, I was on my lunch break one day. I look up and I see a fat bich jump off the newspaper bulding, fall 25 stories, and THUT! The bitch's blood and brains were everywhere, dude! I'm like, "That was fucking awsome!"
Updated: 7-May-2006 14:50
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