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I Am The Eggman
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: anonymous
"A jury convicted a man of murder for fatally shooting a 15-year-old boy who threw eggs at him. The Marion Superior Court jury in Indiana deliberated for seven hours Thursday before finding Donald E. Ware guilty of killing Brandon Dunson-Taylor. Ware, 37, of Avon, Ind., showed no emotion as he looked at the jury while the verdict was read. He faces 79 years in prison and was scheduled to be sentenced on Dec. 15."
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From: jimbojakkjonsun [john smyth]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 07:43
boy should have learned to duck
From: marginallawyer [Just Kick My Ass Off This Planet]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 07:48
Now, being a lawyer myself, my defense strategy would be to say that my client was shooting at the eggs, etc.
From: jobbyjim [darrius sphincter]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 08:13
Eggman should have used a semi-auto then he could have killed all the Jubangis.
From: krazymissi [krazy missi]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 09:36
It should have been self defense anyway. I wish more people would shoot the little egg throwing tards. They don't care if they ruin someones paint job because they know they will never work to buy one. The fact that they were black probably had nothing to do with it. It was just a plus.
From: gargoyle1
Date: 3-Dec-2005 09:37
That'll teach those asshole kids to throw eggs,, shoot a few more of them
From: patmccock
[patmccock]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 09:53
Sounds like Mr. Ware could have used some serious anger-management counseling and possible medication. Sure no one wants to have eggs thrown at them or their personal property, but shooting someone over the incident is a little extreme.
From: sloppy [zitler]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 10:04
Which goes faster? The bullet or the egg?
From: piscivore [Michael C. Scott]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 10:28
Don't throw eggs at people.
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 11:04
I saw this article, but I didn't think it rated a submission. However, since it's here, I would add that when we were kids we egged everything that moved, including our selves. Did you all know that eggs, no matter how hard they are thrown, just bounce off of leather jackets? I remember one guy who got hit by a lucky shot, as he drove on the far side of the Ave. screeched to a halt, & came out after us. Boy was he pissed. When he realized we weren't going to run away, he left. I am glad he wasn't packing, lol.
From: studgerbil [Stud]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 11:07
For the price of a few eggs, you can totally ruin a man's life. That is a lesson of value to any bored punk.
From: vampyerlesbos [Baby Gorilla]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 11:38
Hey egg throwing assholes Throw eggs you gonna get your ass shot! Haw-Haw!! Don't take an egg to a gun fight.
From: backuptheholler [Junebug James]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 12:25
Whatever happened to beat their ass and get on with life? This egghead threw his life in the crapper over kids doing stupid shit kids do. So, actually, he is the most stupid one of the bunch.
From: richardcranium
[Phil McCracken]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 12:40
So did he immediately open fire or did he actually go home to get his gun? How did he get caught? If I were his defense atty, I'd just tell the jury that we now live in a society where terrorists' acts are no longer treated lightly. We have the right to defend ourselves against any attacks on our bodies. He thought he was being attacked by bird flu eggs. He was acting in the most patriotic way he could. He tried saving his fellow Americans. This man is a hero who struck at the wrong attacker, a fellow American who grossly misjudged the violent times we live in.
From: canadagirl78
[God, make me chaste. But not yet.]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 12:59
From: vampyerlesbos [Baby Gorilla] Date: 3-Dec-2005 11:38 Hey egg throwing assholes Throw eggs you gonna get your ass shot! Haw-Haw!! Don't take an egg to a gun fight. ___________________________________________________________________________ They threw the eggs first. He brought a gun to an egg fight, if anything. Anyway, shooting someone who throws eggs at you is just a shade on the completely-overreacting scale. Pitch a few rocks at the little fuckers, fine, chase 'em and beat 'em up if need be, but shooting seems just a touch too far.
From: blissfulgirl
[~^-^~]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 13:11
Ware's mother, Donna Ware, said her son was innocent.
"He's done a lot of dumb things, but he would never kill anyone unless it was in self-defense," she said. I get so annoyed by parents like this... Donna your son is guilty...your stupid adult kid shot at some other moms stupid teenage kids throwing eggs....raw eggs, not bombs, not rocks, not killer bees, but eggs. He didn't shoot in the air to scare them, he shot right at them to kill them...for throwing eggs. I've searched online and I can find no record of death resulting from being hit by a raw egg. So Donna, you just have to accept the fact that you raised yourself an asshat with no common sense and while he may be in jail...at least he survived that potentially lethal raw egg attack.
From: guntotingliberal [GunTotingLiberal]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 13:22
Proving once again, guns don't kill people, eggs kill people. But seriously though, people need to realize its always been and still is a dangerous world. If you attack a stranger, even with something stupid like a snowball or an egg you run the risk of their retaliation in whatever form. I was in paris for new years eve in 2000 and unbeknownest to me the french like to throw m-80 like firecrackers at each other. My family and I quickly learned to avoid them and the throwers but it was common; most people were doing it. But. When some "utes" shook up a 2L thing of coke and threw it on my and my touristy family, well, lets just say I retaliated and broke some child abuse laws that day. I think I did anyway, they looked like they were high school age, maybe college. I didn't shoot them though but I bet they will be reluctant to do that again. I still wonder if they really expected me to do nothing?
From: will [william]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 15:32
wasn't there a recent case where somebody was permanently blinded when someone threw an egg and the shell cut their eyes? 2nd question: what is the title in reference to?
From: poontang [footlong]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 16:15
another fucktard teen removed from this place...and a useless floridian at that... give that man a medal...well, at least give him a few more bullets
From: tsentsen [tsentsen]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 16:22
The only one present at this circus and who seems to have a shred of sense is, ***Dunson-Taylor's great uncle, Charles Russell, said the incident was a lesson for teens to avoid the actions that led to the shooting.*** Not that it warrants the use of shot gun justice, but these kids were throwing eggs at motorists. I'm not familiar with law in FL, however in IL it is illegal to throw objects at a moving vehicle. There was a case of juvies dropping rocks off of an overpass in Chicago. An accident with fatalities ensued when the driver of a vehicle that had had its windshield taken out by one of the rocks lost control. Certainly there are molecular differentials between a rock or an egg. However the differential becomes moot in that either item when used as a projectile may cause distraction and interfere with the safe operation of a vehicle.
From: hawk3 [tritium]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 16:27
Will,it's the Beatles,"I Am The Walrus", and it's goo goo goo joob, I think.
From: tsentsen [tsentsen]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 16:49
On the lighter side, didn't the fat lady in the pig pen who would eat nothing but eggs eventually marry the eggman? We're talking Pink Flamingoes here.....
From: hawk3 [tritium]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 17:20
Expert textpert choking smokers Don't you think the joker laughs at you? ha ha ha
From: tucanscrew [three's more fun]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 17:35
according to the album insert it is koo koo ka joo. I thought shooting was reserved for the little bastards that cream mailboxes with baseball bats. A few well thrown rocks stopped the teens that would drive down my street shooting paintballs at houses. Tsk Tsk.
From: backuptheholler [Junebug James]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 18:33
Yellow matter custard, dripping from a dead dog's eye. Crabalocker fishwife, pornographic priestess, Boy, you been a naughty girl you let your knickers down. I am the eggman, they are the eggmen. I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 19:18
Shit, it's been 25 years since Lennon wrote his last lyrics. Hinckley robbed us all.
From: aulduron
[Aulduron]
Date: 3-Dec-2005 19:27
I'm not familiar with law in FL, Florida law is irrelevant, since it happened in Indiana. The story was taken from an Orlando TV stations web sight.
From: mikeisgreen
[Mike]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 01:07
"jury in Indiana deliberated for seven hours" Aren't juries supposed to deliberate the merits of the case according to the law? What took them 7 hours? The kids threw eggs, the man chased them down and fired while they were running. He shot one of them in the back. That doesn't even come close to self-defence anywhere I know of. 7 hours to decide this guy hunted down these kids and deliberately shot at them. What a bunch of morons.
From: deathbox [Pinky]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 04:04
I think Eggman haven't got any sense of humor. This was a prank, not a crime. In my country, you grab the kid, give him a ride home, talk to his parents. If he comes back, grab him and call the police, then they talk to the parents. Our way is to teach them to respect the law, and other peoples property, and other people. Respect the children, even the tricksters, they may become presidents one day. And throw bombs instead of eggs... that was a funny one. 
From: wingedmonkeyminion [Satan Himself]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 05:03
To: azdollarbill. Mark David Chapman shot Lennon, not "Hinkley". You wing(ed) nut!
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 09:38
Oh OK, anyway, what's in a name? It's just too damn bad that we were missing his music all these years. So who did Hinkley shoot?
From: studgerbil [Stud]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 09:40
Look, the kids are obviously "Indigo Children" and should be treated like the Royal Higher-life-forms they are. Shooting at a highly-evolved life form is just wrong. RIP Frank Zappa, 12 years ago today. ON YOUR KNEES, MORONS!
From: cirrusminor [Caro]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 10:20
I think it's hi-larious that something as serious as the murder of a fifteen year old boy got completely disregarded from the center down and the beatles came up. Now THAT.. is something. and it is koo koo ka joo
From: goldamyass [Drucilla]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 12:19
AZ, I think Hinkley took a shot at Reagan, didn't he? This was the Jodie Foster deal. Someone correct me if I'm wrong. I read about it years ago, and all I remember is, after the FBI went to tell his parents, his mother just kept sliding off the couch all day. People would come by, folks would phone, and every half hour or so, someone would go over and pull Mrs. Hinkley back up on the sofa. Then the process would repeat.
From: piscivore [Michael C. Scott]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 12:35
I think pepper-spraying the little bastards would have been more appropriate. Use the extra-strong stuff sporting goods stores sell to hikers for use on bears and cougars, and give the little shitbags the entire can.
From: jhigh [apathy incarnate]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 12:48
I wonder if they were yelling, EGG WHITEY!" as they were throwing the eggs, heh heh... But, as far as the above comment of "Did you all know that eggs, no matter how hard they are thrown, just bounce off of leather jackets?", goes, WTF? Does leather have some magical egg repellant abilities?
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 13:27
From: goldamyass [Drucilla] Date: 4-Dec-2005 12:19 AZ, I think Hinkley took a shot at Reagan, didn't he? This was the Jodie Foster deal. Someone correct me if I'm wrong. I read about it years ago, and all I remember is, after the FBI went to tell his parents, his mother just kept sliding off the couch all day. People would come by, folks would phone, and every half hour or so, someone would go over and pull Mrs. Hinkley back up on the sofa. Then the process would repeat. ------------------------------------------------------------------ Thanks for the info, & LMAO at your description. I think I get them confused, because they happened around the same period in history, & of cause Hinkley/Reagan gets far more publicity, but, Lennon/Chapman,with Lennon being by far the better man than Ronnie, deserves it the most. As for my leather jacket remark, I have no clue why the eggs bounce off, but they do, at least they did then. The other kids would not even bother throwing them at me, because if I saw it coming, I could catch them as they bounced off, & return fire. I loved my leather jacket, especially on Halloween.
From: georgedublubusch [Head pooBa]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 13:44
I'd like to shoot my bullets at canada girls eggs heh heh
From: wingedmonkeyminion [Satan Himself]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 13:57
cirrusminor has a point; a fifteen year old is dead and we're talking about the Beatles. But all we were saying, is give peace a chance. What inner turmoil, what despair could not be resisted by the shooter? whose sensibilities were offended by a heinous slight to his character; that in recompense the future of another human being be forfeit? Rotten overview: just another Darwin moment. Kid shouldn'ta been provokin', adult shouldn'ta overreacted. Such is life... Wonder what's on TV tonight...?
From: hawk3 [tritium]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 14:27
OK, Lennon was a self-important prick who had a poor taste in women(Yukko Ohno). Reagan was a self-important prick with a poor taste in women (Nancy just say no) Lennon espoused peace through music and by sleep ins, bag-ins, and breaking up the Beatles. Reagan espoused peace by arming the US to the teeth and involving the Soviets in an arms war that broke their bank and collapsed their "evil empire". He brought about the end of the cold war and freedom, or at least, a chance to be free, to millions. Hinkley shot Reagan because he was psychotic. Chapman shot Lennon because he was psychotic. Lennon was cool and I like his music, but Reagan did more through his political victories. Now you can beat me up verbally and call me a loon for posting this.
From: goldamyass [Drucilla]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 15:23
AZ, I think that event was also the birth of the Brady Bill.
From: canadagirl78
[God, make me chaste. But not yet.]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 16:40
Hawk3: Lennon was cool and I like his music, but Reagan did more through his political victories. Now you can beat me up verbally and call me a loon for posting this. No beating required, but I will say one thing. Reagan was a president. Lennon was a long haired hippie singer with a screamin bitch for a wife. Reagan probably should have had more of an impact than Lennon.
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 17:15
The Soviet Union was a "Dead Country Walking". It would have self destructed in any event. Ronnie just happened to be in the right place at the right time. It actually was Gorby who was instrumental in what happened. Oh & let's not leave out the drunk either. He might have been a lousy Russian Prez, but he sure had balls. I will give Ronnie bonus points for demanding that the Berlin Wall be taken down. Lenon's music will be popular, in one form or another, long after Ronnie's memory has faded away into obscurity.
From: blotto1 [daotto]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 18:24
This "useless" Floridian doesn't pay state tax -How 'bout you slapnuts??. Your opinion means shit- boy. "Footlong" I hope you are freezing your pansy fucking ass off. So here's a good generalization for you - Where ever you are from - EVERYONE is an idiot and chugs massive cock. Start chuggin' asshole.
From: blotto1 [daotto]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 18:33
"Thanks for the info, & LMAO at your description. I think I get them confused, because they happened around the same period in history, & of cause Hinkley/Reagan gets far more publicity, but, Lennon/Chapman,with Lennon being by far the better man than Ronnie, deserves it the most" What is so funny about the above statement is that this fucking idiot is serious.
From: blotto1 [daotto]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 18:43
But, as far as the above comment of "Did you all know that eggs, no matter how hard they are thrown, just bounce off of leather jackets?", goes, WTF? Does leather have some magical egg repellant abilities? I want to repeat this question -what a waste of fucking time.
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 18:43
Pst...hey blotto1...I heard that 20 Mule Team is looking for another ass. You would fit right in.
From: piscivore [Michael C. Scott]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 20:12
"The Soviet Union was a dead country walking..." So was Nazi Germany. It was only a "matter of time." A matter of time before Britons greeted each other with a hearty "Tag; wie geht's? Wie viele Juden und adere Untermenschen haben Sie heute in dem Ofen gekocht?"
From: cyprian
[matt]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 22:07
The original liner notes, in the actual LP, had "goo goo ga joob". I am mystified by this koo koo ka joo thing. Not to mention that you can google this and end all confusion. WTF?
From: piscivore [Michael C. Scott]
Date: 4-Dec-2005 22:52
"Dead country walking." It still strikes me as a cowardly, roundabout way for the socialists to take credit for civilization having won the Cold War. "Ausgezeichnet. Jeden tag letzte Woche Ich hatte drei Zigeuner ganz gut verbrennt. Shau mal; Picadilly Circus U-Bahnhoff. Auf Wiedersehen!"
From: robwrigley
Date: 4-Dec-2005 23:50
piscivore: "It still strikes me as a cowardly, roundabout way for the socialists to take credit for civilization having won the Cold War." The one thing that I have never been able to come to terms with is "True Believer's Syndrome". That is, the ability of folks to hold onto a belief no matter how untenable it becomes. It is like willful ignorance and rigorous intellectual dishonesty. There is a lot of that kind of thing flying around this message board, and is one of the reasons I began frequenting it. There is a good mix of well-thought out posts, and absolute nut-jobs (and/or, you know, college kids). Back to the Cold War: I forget who said it, or even the exact quote, but it went something like this: "Liberals believe that it would be great if everyone would live together in peace and harmony. Conservatives read history books." I wouldn't claim that Reagan was wholly responsible for the collapse of the U. S. S. R. He did presided over the funeral. But it was U. S. and NATO policy, going back to the end of WWII, that that bankrupted the Soviets. It is really an amazing bit of history, and an object lesson in long-term strategy. Rob
From: melvin69 [John Bong]
Date: 5-Dec-2005 02:54
Eggs are very hard. Me and a friend started chucking eggs at each other one day (we were bored teenagers). I got hit by a few, 1 of them hit my jawbone and hurt me alot but didn't break. As for a leather jacket, I would think any jacket would do to pad the impact a little. The egg hit by jaw at a slight angle so that helped some. Did I mention they hurt? Getting hit in the face with a hardpacked snowball is comparable, though slightly bigger area. As for Reagan and the Cold War, the liberals say Reagan had nothing to do with it, conservatives say he had everything to do with it. That's just because he was a republican. If it was a democrat, they would be saying the opposite thing. I say though that Reagan had a good bit to do with it. If it wasn't for his spending, USSR would've taken a bit longer to collapse, then Clinton would've claimed it. Then finally for the comment on the story, bet that kid ain't going to throw eggs anymore. Sure the guy could've grabbed the kid and had the kid's parents deal with him, but the kid probably would've been back out the next day throwing eggs at another car.
From: mindwarp [pithy quote]
Date: 5-Dec-2005 04:01
What a wonderful man Reagan was to bankrupt the USSR so that the Russians could live in spiralling poverty while their country was carved up by organized criminals. Especially as he left America in serious debt too, and with a bloated military sector which, without the balance of a serious rival, now threatens the security of the whole world, not least that of America itself, volatile and almost bankrupt as it is.
From: studgerbil [Stud]
Date: 5-Dec-2005 04:16
lol @ mindwarp. I'm guessing you're putting a handful of fanatics with boxcutters right up there with Thomas Paine, as true heroes of the revolution?
From: robwrigley
Date: 5-Dec-2005 08:24
Mindwarp: Yeah, it sucks to be a Russian. But their rulers went from political criminals to organized hoods. But if you review Russian history, it has been just as corrupt for hundreds, if not a thousand years. As for the U.S.: Oh come on...this country is a lot of things, but bankrupt ain't it. We have a long, long, long way to go before we are even close to the international poverty line. Only in America are the poor people fat, and being poor means you can only afford basic cable. And don't get me started on air conditioners, Christmas lights, and everyone driving their fucking cars a quarter mile to the Blockbuster and back. Rob
From: unclefuckah [man eater]
Date: 5-Dec-2005 10:42
We were all kids once. He should have taught the kid a lesson in a different way or called Police or something. Now a kid is dead and the ashole loser who shot him will have a new boyfriend ass fucker in prison for the rest of his life. I bet he regrets shooting him now!! stoopid! "There's more than corn in Indiana" we have eggs and guns, too, biotch!
From: unclefuckah [man eater]
Date: 5-Dec-2005 10:44
Reagan is dead. Lennon is dead. Let's move on.
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 5-Dec-2005 16:24
Rob said:"I wouldn't claim that Reagan was wholly responsible for the collapse of the U. S. S. R. He did presided over the funeral. But it was U. S. and NATO policy, going back to the end of WWII, that that bankrupted the Soviets. It is really an amazing bit of history, and an object lesson in long-term strategy." I will go along with that. Remember it was a combination of Dem, & GOP administrations all during the cold war. Ike had 8, JFK/LBJ 8, Nixon/Ford 8, Carter 4, and then Ronnie.
From: seether [cassie]
Date: 6-Dec-2005 10:18
fuck knows wat he'd do if he lived here and it was halloween..........wat if it was halloween everyday man he'd have no cash left coz he'd have 2 keep buying bullets and i thought it was quite funni this yr coz a bus got egged where i live lol
Updated: 9-Dec-2005 10:25
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