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Mystery Pile of Shit
Livingston Daily | Submitted by: Myrtle the Turtle
"Livingston County police are looking for the person who dumped an estimated couple hundred pounds of human waste on Highlander Way near Highland Road (M-59) Tuesday morning."
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From: scattylegreat [My boyfriend doesn't know about my shit hand]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 11:53
Yay poop!
From: numeskin [wildbill]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:25
I guess the Bush family is cleaning house.
From: killbill [ISwindledTheFBI]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:27
amerika, land of one big pile of shit.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:32
There can be only one........large reeking pile of fly-blown human excrement to gain the prize. Luckily, it didn't occur on holy ground. 'There'll be no burning here today..........we'll bury it'.
From: noracejusthuman
[Alien From Earth]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:47
..arab troll...i feel like such a "Jethro"...are you really tss/alien?...i remember tss was "splainin" stuff here one day to me.. and said he used 4 other names..wow..i'm a real goober...i can barely keep up with one name...what you see here is all i got... :)..did i mention i type real sloww?....
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:50
fuck ye's-i had to go. it's me high fiber diet. i drop and squat when the knockin commences. i blame gerald butlers abdominals for my impudence
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:52
I evacuated an enormous bowl-winder myself this morning!
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:53
Only Spartan men give birth to REAL turds!
From: fucktardmama [fook-me]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:08
Wow. Kill Bill's mom dropped him off at the side of the road. Damn her. Leaving that kind of mess for someone else to clean up.
From: zebrabob [zebrabobsgotabigone]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:14
whew! Someone was constipated! ...that or there's a giant running around the Highlands on a high fiber diet!
From: gargoyle1
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:33
I do know it wasn't me. I don't even know where this happened and I haven't left this state in a year or so.
From: guitarded [Jimi Vaughan]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:39
I'll bet the perpetrator had to save up for a long time to stock-pile this much shit. I wonder where he stored it.
From: mcintyre [fuck]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:44
Only couple hundred? Killbill spews many times that. allah ron l hubbard
From: aulduron
[Aulduron]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:45
A motor home would open their tank and leave, trailing waste behind them, hitting the brakes to dislodge what gets stuck.. It was probably a company that empties porta johns and septic tanks.
From: onedumbguy [not smart]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:46
Dave Matthews band unavilable for comment..
From: jeanclaudediablo [Jean Claude Diablo]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:51
Knuckle deep in mayo like "yum"
From: sp00k
Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:55
A couple hundred pounds of human waste. KB! Was that you?
From: droogie [Brent]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 14:29
So THAT'S where Karl Rove & Alberto Gonzales wound up.
From: retard [THE]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 14:32
Oh, and I thought that many more of you would proudly take responsibility for this.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:00
Defecation. Although some of these scat sites do tend to diefy egestate!
From: ciaochowbella [I didn't do it and I wasn't there when it happened]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:09
From: gargoyle1 Date: 6-Sep-2007 13:33 I do know it wasn't me. I don't even know where this happened and I haven't left this state in a year or so. ------------------------------- Hey, that's my line.......
From: ohhellno
[steve-vo]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:12
Probably someone was carrying it somewhere to be dumped and lost it in the middle of the road and said screw that! just kept driving........ Makes me wonder the corn to shit ratio if its from people.....
From: gargoyle1
Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:35
Bella, opps, LOL DD, bite my rectum, this isn't my fucking english class from high school,, I'm sure my old teacher is long composted.
From: myrtle
[theturtle]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:46
sadly, I used to call this town home.....now look what it has come to, a big pile of shit, oh, wait, that is why I move, oh yeah, that and the unemployment, copsuckers, and of course the general smell......and the 10 feet of snow
From: killbill [ISwindledTheFBI]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:48
Now you yanks can plant victory and mission accomplished flags on all the little piles of poo!
From: doesshe
[ever shut up, that DS?]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:50
From: gargoyle1 Date: 6-Sep-2007 15:35 Bella, opps, LOL DD, bite my rectum, this isn't my fucking english class from high school,, ---------------------- Wait, you had used 2 commas there. Just fucking with you!
From: elfboy
[blinky7]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:04
"I feel shitty, oh so shitty , oh so shitty & empty, & light! I'm just glad I did it all at night!" Apologies to Rogers & Hammerstein.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:07
I'm sure my old teacher is long composted. ------------- Decomposed. And up your ass with a bag of grass!
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:10
And DS.......(Wait, you had used 2 commas there) needs not the 'had' used. No purpose in denoting passed-tense twice!
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:21
i've passed tents afore-no biggie
From: skyeyez9
[Marie]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:27
Cameron dumped a King Kong poop in the toilet aka commode choker. This usually happens at somebody elses house. .................... From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Sep-2007 12:52 I evacuated an enormous bowl-winder myself this morning!
From: okshunalljeanyes [Sometimes Not]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:32
All they had to do was put a sign on it saying... Free lunch, if your name is killbill
From: slyslick [andwicked]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:33
You know how it is, when you hold it so long, you get a turtlehead...
From: doesshe
[ever shut up, that DS?]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:34
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:10 And DS.......(Wait, you had used 2 commas there) needs not the 'had' used. No purpose in denoting passed-tense twice! ----------------- Leave me alone! It is grammar defect of mine and it can't be cured!
From: studgerbil
[Stud]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:51
We come on the poop John B My grandfather and me Around nassau town we did roam Pooping all night Got into a fight Well I feel so broke up I want to go home
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:05
ahh-si-the poo poo platter served ala carte blanche shit hit the ground running
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:11
Change.....nuthin' stays the same.
From: houseof1mcorpses [(1104N.MissionRoad)]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:13
It'z all abpout tje pooo
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:14
no no no no-dont take em off-leave em on-
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:14
From: skyeyez9 [Marie] Date: 6-Sep-2007 16:27 Cameron dumped a King Kong poop in the toilet aka commode choker. This usually happens at somebody elses house. ---------- Who said it didn't! And into the pest-tent w/snatchy! It got pox. (on both houses I assume)
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:23
'Unchained'.......fuck, I got a steel-trap! Slight inconsistencies coalesce in mine bonce after the fact. Pentium processing ain't got shit!
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:23
aye-calamity jane can mop my brow while nigga general wipes my arse with steve the drunk
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:26
unchain my fart shit hit the road, jack
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:29
The Reverend Smith might have one of his fits (Al's brother suffered those) whilst elbow deep in your money-maker! 'How's that pussy lotion.....should I try some on my ass'?
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:33
you know-when you laugh; piss squirts outa yer cunt.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:40
'When you giggle.....you leak piss' is the actual line. We used to have Sunday night bashes, and hoot and holler like any Deadwoodean hoople-heads at the erudite discourse! Pickwickean indeed if you can handle a small Dickensian bon mot. You and jillawf should grind snatches ala Joanie Stubbs (may fave) and post the hijinks for Al and sundry. The fuckin' widow Garrett/Elsworth gets on my tits......I hope she is raped by Hostettler's ghost!
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:43
pardon my french- thas fine-i speak french limey cocksucker
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 17:45
send poopers, turds and crap=the buttfunk has hit the fan
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:12
goodun eggs-hahaha and his shit was perfect goyle-i'm down for that-pick me up on yer way to the stoop. debbil entendre
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:21
Send voyeurs, moats and honey...the bread has flit the spam.
From: shanon [shanon]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:23
Where in the hell is godzilla? And why did he do this?
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:28
I've got a loaf for you to pinch between your teeth and gummies Goylage.....an olive loaf; interspersed with some 'head' cheese! (and it be smegma-like and gamy.....jest how ya like it!)
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:31
Snatchy....your affected patois is rife with Briticisms. You cannot escape it. It takes one luv!
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:32
shit on the water and poopoo in the sky
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:38
Cry your eyes my little bend Let me pound up you the sand Freddie get ready...crock steady When Johnny shites up the band When Johnny shites up the.. When Johnny shites up the.. When Johnny shites up the..can!
From: 69rotten69 [oh yeah]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:39
Phone records will show that Michael Vick received a call from his attorney in that vicinity on the night in question. Off topic: Has anyone ever felt like they took a huge dump only to check the commode and find it turdless? What happened to it? Did it have enough velocity to shoot the rapids and make the turn on its own? ....or was it a ghost turd?? Things like that just keep me wondering sometimes for days.
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:41
raised in the debbil's crotch so i was- if ye cut yer toofs on the bard-deadwood innit much of a stretch-nee
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:42
pick me up on yer way to the stoop. debbil entendre ----------- The 'stoop' snatchy......nobody in the U.S knows what a sodding stoop is. But a great 'debbil' entendre nonetheless. What droll amusement!
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:46
if ye cut yer toofs on the bard-deadwood innit much of a stretch-nee --------------------------------------- No; but its gratifying all the same to experience your native tongue displayed with a modicum of wit and cleverness. Why am I here? 'Al and sundry'....I fuckin' slay myself!
From: rotteneggs13
[a bakers dozen]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:50
I got the poos & you got the shits. Turd On The Run (m. jagger/k. richards) Grabbed hold of your coat tail but it come off in my hand, I reached for your lapel but it weren't sewn on so grand. Begged, promised anything if only you would stay, Well, I lost a lot of love over you. Fell down to my knees and I hung onto your pants, But you just kept on runnin while they ripped off in my hands. Diamond rings, vaseline, you give me disease, Well, I lost a lot of lover over you. I boogied in the ballroom, I boogied in the dark; Tie you hands, tie you feet, throw you to the sharks. Make you sweat, make you scream, make you wish you'd never been, I lost a lot of love over you
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:51
then mayhap he shall meet me at the verge= and we will purge with a surge-eh=scourge?
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:53
steamers? with drawn butter. i'm undone axetally, goyle, you and lil debble live spittin distance-nee?
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:55
jumping jack shit with lotsa gas
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 18:58
Exile on main St! Lubitt. 'Women think Im tasty, but theyre always tryin to waste me And make me burn the candle right down, But baby, baby, I dont need no jewels in my crown. Cause all you women is low down gamblers, Cheatin like I dont know how, But baby, baby, theres fever in the funk house now. This low down bitchin got my poor feet a itchin, You know you know the duece is still wild. Baby, I cant stay, you got to roll me And call me the tumblin' dice'! 'Poor shitifull me' indeed Linda! I don't care how many Mexifornia governors you blow.....that'll ALWAYS be a 'Stones' tune!
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:02
aye-mayhap they swap shit-ye think?
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:03
Layin' on the ebonics are we my snatchy?.........try Bella for 'pointers'..... she can lead you to the 'dark side'. (debbil entendre)
From: docdoober [IHavePnS]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:10
Dilution is the solution to pollution. re: why they washed it off the road. And I'm so glad that "I can't see it from my backdoor!"
From: gargoyle1
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:11
Dunno snatch, I'm in the heart of liberal land, CT to be exact. God I need to move west. I don't swap shit wit no bodies either.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:14
Did you hear me jump the shithouse wall?
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:23
I might trade with you Goyle.......I'm looking to move East. (NY or NJ most likely since I spent much time there in earlier days) Arizona is too fucking hot! (although I don't cherish the leftish liberal pussy fag politicos often found there.)
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:29
I'm called the hit-and-run shitter in anger.. The turd-sharpened turtle-toe; Or just the shit 'em dead excrement dangler.. You know, the one you never smelled before
From: 69rotten69 [oh yeah]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:39
If turds weren't tapered, would your asshole just slam shut?
From: noracejusthuman
[Alien From Earth]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:42
DD...nothern arizona where i live is MUCH cooler..BUT it has even MORE leftist, pussy, liberal fags..what with the 2 colleges up here..Hold on to your guts... John Kerry even Won in our district...good luck with the move..
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:48
I suppose I'll just have to deal with the heat and Sheriff Joe whilst you do your karaoke to the Monkeys. Its a trade-off I can live with!
From: rotteneggs13
[a bakers dozen]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:48
I just ate a full-on home cooked turkey dinner. all the fixins in shit. I won't crap for about 2 weeks & 3 days. What would be the latin name for dust bunnies? DD?
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:51
Speak up DS....me and Eggy were just shitting about! I always marvel how people come to this site and forget that the very name is fucking 'ROTTEN'!
From: static [arking quotes]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:52
From: lordpakul [Lord Pakul] Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:10 Where do you get your pics. Very funny!
From: lordpakul [Lord Pakul]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:59
static , http://forums.dailyrotten.com/575/00026497/_index.html#563892
From: armchairdeviant [Benny Benobers]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:01
Here's my choice for top suspect.... http://www.joyangeles.com/myranda/myrandabiggest.htm
From: lordpakul [Lord Pakul]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:01
daredevil , I never forget: http://www.mudfall.com/Mud.swf
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:01
You may have me there Eggy-wegs; 'Lepus abacus' I believe. Lepus is Latin for 'rabbit', which I already knew (as I would).......I took a whirl at 'dust' (googled it and made a quick approximation) Of course an abacus is also a Phoenecian counting instrument....so philogical overlap may be evident within the translation.
From: doesshe
[ever shut up, that DS?]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:03
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Sep-2007 19:51 Speak up DS....me and Eggy were just shitting about! ------------------ DD, post an especially horrific pic for me! XXX, DS
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:17
I'm not sure I have one DS.....Pakul is the Master of Reality with regard to the 'rotten' images! They shut down my pic-shop or whatever.....due to 'pornographic' images I posted; which I deemed to be quite tasteful in nature. Look at this poor hound with his face impaled with porcupine quills. This one of you and Bella is somewhat repulsive too! Ralphage!
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:21
Charting a trip to Siam with that sextant are we Eggy? Marca Polo?
From: doesshe
[ever shut up, that DS?]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:26
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:17 I'm not sure I have one DS.....Pakul is the Master of Reality with regard to the 'rotten' images! They shut down my pic-shop or whatever.....due to 'pornographic' images I posted; which I deemed to be quite tasteful in nature. ___________________ I am not surprised.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:49
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:39 Sir Francis Drake circumnavigated the globe....something which Captain Bligh failed to accomplish. Obviously, Bligh ran into personnel difficulties. Of course Drake hanged half a dozen officers and excommunicated the chaplain Fletcher. (no relation to Fletcher Christian of the Bligh voyage) And of course Drake was a heroic Admiral at the English defeat of the Spanish Armada in 1558. 75% of Drake's crew was lost.....and of 5 ships only 2 returned; but the ones that did were set for life.....and ALL the Plymouth seadogs begged to serve on his next voyage; and ALL the moneyed landownersw licked his arse to underwrite his next adventure. Can't do that now.....go and die like a white n1gger in Iraq is all....no rape, plunder, booty, or spoils. What's the fuckin' point?
From: metalballs [fourtwenty]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 20:50
Caca, pure, steamin', caca. Foooo, caca, apestosa a mierda.
From: ciaochowbella [I didn't do it and I wasn't there when it happened]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 21:49
Interesting turd to note......I shat a vertical floater tonight. The rest of the poop sank happily and was flushed readily. This odd little bobber not only resisted 4 good solid flushings, but remained in the locked and upright position for the entirety of the aquatic event. I finally covered it in TP so that it had enough friction to be caught in the swirl and pass from this world to the next.
From: chinnuts
[Got Three For Ya]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 22:10
nobody in the U.S knows what a sodding stoop is. ------------------ Been to Philly, same wasted afternoons in Akron. Dopey me! Shame on me! I feel dirty!!
From: abluecommunist
[Red is for republicans, dammit!]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 22:51
ciao, what color was it? Brown? Tan? Black? Were there peanuts/corn present? When you wiped, did it require several passes or was it a clean dump? Inquiring minds wish to know. Oh, and once I get a camera phone, I'm posting my dick. Just a little heads up for everyone.
From: noracejusthuman
[Alien From Earth]
Date: 6-Sep-2007 23:06
since we are already hERE..in... to shit...I've heard that if your poop usually has some floaters,,it means you might be eating well...EXTRA fats..protein tend to "to turn a "battleship" into a nuclear sub..."
From: ciaochowbella [I didn't do it and I wasn't there when it happened]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 06:45
Thank you, DS, but you wouldn't have blinked twice if a man had posted that. We are talking about shit here, and while we don't like to think about it, everyone has to shit at some point. Commie, it was sort of greenish-brown. The rest was reddish with a few English peas bobbing about. Only two passes of the TP were required.....one to clean, one to come back clean. There was no lingering odor or cloud. Also, I am eagerly awaiting the arrival of photos of your penis.
From: retardskickass
[bon]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 06:59
You know... I really thought I was part of a very small group of adults who laugh like children when poopie is mentioned. This thread makes me very, very wrong. And it makes me oh so happy.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 07:36
In that case bon-bon....I'll dedicate my next swirling turd to your evil sense of humour. I shall also remind myself to eat much corn the previous night in your specific honor!
From: sp00k
Date: 7-Sep-2007 08:39
If they want to find the culprit, check the local mexican food joints and find out who ordered the Mucho Grande Bean Burrito Fiesta Meal. (Has to be within a couple blocks of the crime scene)
From: killbill [ISwindledTheFBI]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 09:07
"U.S. Intelligence Officials Confirm They're finalizing the making of Bin Laden Tape!" Oh NOES more washingtonian bullshit...what did you expect goyim?
From: sp00k
Date: 7-Sep-2007 09:22
"U.S. Intelligence Officials Confirm They're finalizing the making of Bin Laden Tape!" Due to be released in time for this Holiday season. Rated PG13 Starring - Bill, the smiling goat. In Select theaters.
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 09:50
chinnuts shit dina stink. wafts of sage and sandalwood accompany his every pass of gastric essence- each turd perfectly formed as it delicately plurps into the chamber pot. the queen herself insists on dabbing the dew from chinny's pucker with a hand crocheted hankie. i bow to the greatness of his bowels. amen
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 10:19
sarcastic fuck snatchypubes!
From: barghest [buck fush]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 11:55
Damnit, update for Friday already, it's a hot news day. Pavarotti's dead and Italy's practically having a fucking Mardi Gras for his funeral. And I want one of my fellow Rotteneers to come up with the nekkid picture of Vanessa Hudgens already. No more "High School Musicals" for you, little slut.
From: allang
[Lord Pavesini]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 12:19
Ever shat a teflon turd? You know, the kind were you don't have to wipe up afterwards? I like that. I believe the whole shitting experience - specifically the euphoria associated with the purging of the bowels - is tragically cheapened by the anti-climax of the afterwards part, where I for one feel compelled to spend a whole fifteen minutes evicting all the straggling grogans and flecks of shit hanging desperately from my ass hairs. I swear, sometimes I spend more time wiping than I do shitting. That's why I like it when I shit a teflon turd, 'cause then I can just up and leave, and take some of the peristalsis high with me. I love to shit, man. Fucking A. I love Ds too. Fucking A.
From: killbill [ISwindledTheFBI]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 12:28
Pavaraty..pfff! My anus strikes a much more heart jerking tune than that washed up dago.
From: barghest [buck fush]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 13:12
Ah. The Friday rottens. Thank you, anonymous website spirits.
From: sharkman69 [Me]
Date: 7-Sep-2007 19:11
Holy shit! (pun intended) This happened not too far from my gun club.
Updated: 12-Sep-2007 14:18
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