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Bicyclist Faceplants
Ananova | Submitted by: anonymous
[Usually we don't link to Ananova but the pictures are funny.]
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From: ninjavenom [ninjavenom]
Date: 25-Dec-2005 23:22
This one's nearly a year old, but i'll be damned if it's not still funny.
From: ragnarlodbrok [Shaggypants]
Date: 25-Dec-2005 23:26
Cute yellow checkered umbrella.
From: ryry [god damn it bones]
Date: 25-Dec-2005 23:46
HE FALL DOWN GO BOOM heheheheh
From: robwrigley
Date: 26-Dec-2005 00:18
Q: What kind of idiot rides a bike with an umbrella? A: The kind who goes face first into the drink while on camera. Rob
From: vega [pooperscooper666]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 00:56
Wear a helmet next time dickhead. And using an umbrella while cycling? That's kinda Wylie Coyote. And the Asians are the stereotypical smart ones?
From: doczzz
[dwarf fusion]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 02:14
The real story here is that people are pissed that the photographer 'lay in wait' for an accident at that pothole. Get real, people. It wasn't the photographer's responsibility to stand there in the rain and make sure no one got hurt, or to go purchase a pylon. That's what city maintenance workers get paid for. He did the next best thing, and took a picture proving how dangerous the pothole was. ************************* And what the hell is wrong with linking to Ananova?
From: genitaliaofsatan [Mr. Genitalia to you, pal]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 02:14
Too many people are getting too much joy out of that man's misery.
From: timmyturtle [tim t turtle]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 02:42
i hope the bike was ok lol..... stupid fucking chink riding a bike while carrying an umbrella, maybe thats part of why he wrecked, and no helmet either, hope he hit good n hard lol, darwin @ work lol
From: twdldee [twdldee]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 02:45
Not much use for the umbrella now. "Keep your eyes on the road, your hand upon the wheel"
From: wingedmonkeyminion [Satan Himself]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 05:19
I agree wit' doczzz; how is it a photographer is responsible for finding a kodak moment from a Darwin moment? If you step in front of a moving bus, am I obligated to shout out a warning because you weren't watching? Civilization is a funny thing.
From: lilfunky [swampass]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 06:53
what a great idea to wait by a pothole covered by rain water for some asshole to come by...just think of the possibilities!
From: necrophiliac [coldone]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 07:31
is compassion the same as sympathy? I found it in the dictionary between shit and syphilis. and i don't need any of them.
From: snyznyk [snyznyk]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 07:43
Cute yellow checkered umbrella. And he didn't drop the umbrella throughout the entire sequence. Musta be a famiry heiroom.
From: dreamphantom [Dream Phantom]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 07:45
In America we would reward the photographer for capturing this evidence so we could sue the city for failing to repair the pothole.
From: meanmrmozzie [Mozzie]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 09:07
Oh come on guys.... Let me in on the Darwin reference that appears everyday. Give me something to search on Google. Darwins theory on relativity? What? Help me please...
From: zebrabob [zebrabobsgotabigone]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 09:15
that's what he gets for bringing an umbrella to a asphalt fight! (hmmm....asphalt assault? road wages roadrage?)
From: backuptheholler
[Junebug James]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 09:49
From: meanmrmozzie [Mozzie]
Oh come on guys.... Let me in on the Darwin reference that appears everyday. Give me something to search on Google. Darwins theory on relativity? What? Help me please... Those who do not learn from Darwin are doomed to end up on Daily Rotten. And the peasants rejoice!
From: ikthool [ikthool]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:00
Darwins theory of relativity....that's pretty good. I think most of us are refering to darwinawards.com (now that I've been a good guy and told you that,mabe someone can tell me how to post a link)
From: meanmrmozzie [Mozzie]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:01
I shiver at the thought of being a subject on rotten.com purely because I am ignorant to the whole Darwin thing. I look up www.aboutdarwin.com but it gave few answers.
From: meanmrmozzie [Mozzie]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:09
Thanks ikthool. Ill do my research now. I feel a lot safer all of a sudden. Cheers!
From: chillywilly [Joe Cool]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:13
accounts [CJ]: "seinfeld good samaritan law comes to mind." You evidently didn't read the link you posted. Good Samaritan laws protect people who TRY to help from being sued by the people they are trying to help. You cannot force someone to help like in the Seinfeld episode. Laws like that are unconstitutional and are struck down very quickly. Unless it's your job (like a policeman or fireman), you cannot make someone do something to help their fellow man (other than pay taxes). For the person asking about it, this is what people here are talking about when they talk about Darwin: [darwinawards.com]
From: phukislam [wipemyasswithkoran]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:14
that's what he gets for putting MSG in my food after saying " no joe, no MSG, no MSG." Fucking liar!
From: lordpakul [Lord Pakul]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:29
meanmrmozzie, It refers to "Natural Selection", through which individuals with bad traits are supposed to reproduce less than other individuals. Of course, our society has almost completely perverted this process. Natural Selection - [wikipedia.org] 
From: backuptheholler
[Junebug James]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:58
Mozzie: Just type Darwin in Google and you'll get the clue. But seriously: Charles Darwin...Scopes monkey trial...intelligent design? You telling me none of this rings any bells? Personally, I am not talking about the Darwin Awards (which is based upon Darwin's theory, but does not require knowledge of who Darwin was nor anything about his theory), but Darwin's actual theory of evolutionary selection: that variation within species occurs randomly and that the survival or extinction of each organism is determined by that organism's ability to adapt to its environment. Or, to put it in the context of human beings, some people are too stupid to survive. And I'm wondering about you, Mozzie.
From: ninjarina [Armed w/ pointes]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:59
"Wear a helmet next time dickhead. And using an umbrella while cycling? That's kinda Wylie Coyote. And the Asians are the stereotypical smart ones?" Ok, I must say that not all Asians have little to no regard for safety/hygeine/etc. - just the ones on the mainland. For example, I was in Guangzhou in my grandparents' home for the summer and many people there have motorbikes. These people have no regard for safety and/or traffic laws. There was a family of three on a motorbike - a husband, wife, and child no more than 3 y/o. The husband was operating the bike and he was wearing A HARDHAT, not strapped in nonetheless; the wife was behind the husband holding the child between her legs. Now frankly, I know what kind of poverty these people live in. I don't think the could find enough surplus cash to afford the types of helmet people living in western Europe or the USA would wear but for pete's sake, he could have at the very least strapped on the hardhat. These people exist everywhere and I think this passive-aggressive stance that the Chinese government is taking on their overpopulation issue isn't cutting it.
From: reader57 [Rotten Reader]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 11:11
That's not an umbrella. It's a safety chute! You don't need a helmet when you carry the 'bike safety chute'. Just deploy it on your way down. If he didn't use his chute the fall would have killed him. Thank you Bike Safety Chute!
From: brightwood
[Bright]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 11:49
Amen Sleepy Doc, Amen Flying Monkey. The only reason there's a story here is because the government wants to divert blame from itself. Why in the world should a photographer be responsible to "warn" people of a trap. In my state, if you warn anybody about an upcoming speed trap, even though the very act of getting those speeders to slow down which protects not only them from the traffic infraction and fine, but protects the rest of the citizenry from the dangers of excessive speed, what happens is that the government arrests you for the felony of "warning another to evade arrest". The government should have fixed the pothole. The cyclist should have been more cautious. But it's the photographer that they somehow want to blame.
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 12:14
They all have a point, but given a choice, between seeing the pics, & warning the guy, I'll bet 98% would go for the pics. I wonder how many he watched who just missed the hole, or who managed to avoid falling? This couldn't have been the first guy to hit it, either, so how come it wasn't fixed. Taking it out on the photographer is short sighted.
From: lollercaust [Lollercaust]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 12:35
My twisted Utilitarian ethics says that there is enough combined joy in all the thousands of people who have seen those pictures than that one mans pain and the pain also caused to those who care about him. Therefore the photographer acted morally.
From: dragon [DrunkenTigerStonedDragon]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 14:08
I like the picture of his face bouncing off the pavement back into the air. In this case a picture is not worth a thousand words, but worth one, dumbass.
From: tsentsen [tsentsen]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 16:21
This, in a country where they torture 'falun dafa' practitioners. All I can do is shake my head in bewilderment and sadness.
From: ozzeh [brett]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 16:54
in the words of Carlos Mencia.... REEEETARD!!
From: cannibal
[No Fat Chicks]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 17:51
From: ikthool [ikthool] Date: 26-Dec-2005 10:00 "Darwins theory of relativity....that's pretty good. I think most of us are refering to darwinawards.com (now that I've been a good guy and told you that,mabe someone can tell me how to post a link)"  It is simple young jedi, merely visualize yourself posting a link, feel the force flowing through you. Then after that shit doesn't work, copy down the address of the website you wish to post from the address bar by right clicking on it and pressing copy. Then post it by clicking right clicking again this time in where you write your text. Then when you post the message the computer simply takes over for you and your left with a pretty little link like this. "http://www.darwinawards.com/" then becomes [darwinawards.com] The same goes for images, though for some you will have to find a site to host them like this one. [imageshack.us]
From: tucanscrew
[three's more fun]
Date: 26-Dec-2005 19:27
From: snyznyk [snyznyk] Date: 26-Dec-2005 07:43 Cute yellow checkered umbrella. And he didn't drop the umbrella throughout the entire sequence. Musta be a famiry heiroom. ================ he was afraid he would get wet. hahahahaha
From: mikeisgreen
[Mike]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 01:13
After having spent a week in the hospital due to a bad bike crash (not my fault, some fucktard ran a red light at 70km/h), I have to say I cringed for this guy. My bike is my main means of transport, and I live in Montreal. We have exceptionally shitty roads in this town, and potholes are everywhere. Biking in this town means sticking to the same route and knowing where all the potholes are. Front rims need to be trued every month if you're not careful. I've seen many bikes with destroyed front rims. I've also seen many cyclists with facial scars (including me, which is why I keep a rug on my chin. The scar is more embarrassing than the 20-odd white hairs in the goatee). I really felt for this guy, until I realised he was carrying an umbrella. The joke that came to my mind at that moment was that the umbrella slowed his fall, negating the need for anything heavier than a light hat. Great way of putting it, reader57. Oh, and timmyturtle, I'm happy to say that my baby survived the crash unhurt...  Although I took the model with a rigid fork. Suspension in the city when riding 40 to 50 km/day is for people who just like to carry the extra weight for no good reason.
From: insaneuker [insaneUKer]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 04:00
sure! blame the guy taking the photos - not the government, Noooo! Funny as hell tho!
From: megaloid [Mega Loid]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 05:28
Driving is not for the insouciant, and the same goes for bicycling, only more so. You have only your wits and your faith in other drivers to protect you. And in urban traffic? In the rain? You'd better have your head on a fucking swivel and have some bright blinky lights, front and back. Otherwise, you become an object lesson in bike safety like the dude in the picture. On a related note, I personally don't think its funny seeing people getting injured/killed, but that's evidently something some of you hominids will have to learn the hard way...
From: kareeshus [Okana]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 06:12
Apparently Rotten doesn't like Ananova. Also, neither does any other website in the world. Does anyone know why Ananova is so universally hated? There must be a reason, and I really really sorta want to know what it is.
From: mikeisgreen
[Mike]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 06:30
Megaloid, you're right on the money. BRIGHT blinky lights. Proper tires for the conditions. I ride the winter on special tires with self-clearing treads and 110 steel studs. Expensive, but if they stop me from skating in front of a bus, they're worth it. NEVER restrict the range of motion of your head and neck. Seeing is every bit as important as being seen. Never cover your ears to the point that you can't hear. Hell, I have known idiots who would wear a Walkman on their bikes. Suicidal. Faith in drivers will get you killed in this town. Always assume that every car around you will do something stupid and unpredictable, because many of them will. Stay as far away from taxis as you can. I've lost count of how many cabs have missed me by an inch or two. All of this while watching the road surface carefully. It's no wonder activities like this can sharpen one's senses. Be aware. Be seen. Be safe.
From: nekoturk [Amy]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 09:13
lol!! I don't think it's the camera man's fault! It's not his job to report potholes to the city. Unless the city is willing to pay him to have that job. Granted, what he did was a little rotten, but in no way is fault. When I drive past a McDonalds and see all those fat fuckers stuffing their faces with slop I could warn them that it is going to kill them. Is that my job, I don't think so. People need to take responsibility for themselves!
From: moltov [Phil McKracken]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 10:20
Hopefully he expidited the matter by filling the pothole with water so it couldn't be seen.
From: moltov [Phil McKracken]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 10:31
What's funny, nekoturk and everyone else, you know this new 'trans fats will KILL you' deal happening, McD's food, or their french fries at least, are loaded with that stuff, something like 9 grams in a large serving or something like that.
From: kenbit [manken]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 10:46
obeavisly he cares more about his umbrella than his face
From: survivalist [pass the joint...and the ammo.]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 11:01
HA! Nice dismount. I am living in Shanghai right now and I haven't witnessed a crash like this but I have seen a good few after the fact. Like ninjarina said, these people fail to abide by any safety/traffic laws at all, be it through ignorance or just not giving a fuck. I see people in shops welding without goggles and using power tools in the dark with a flashlight as their source of light, I also see them smoking near flammable material. That reminds me... I should carry my camera around more often.
From: dougal [richardise]
Date: 27-Dec-2005 13:26
The reactions here to this accident show just how retarded Americans are. A man carries an umbrella in the rain. American reaction?: "How stupid!" (It is in the 40s today where I live and teens are wearing T-shirts outside, teeth chattering, thinking 'it's cool'.) Was the man able to SEE the hole? WHO CARES! Americans like to see him get injured. IT'S FUN! Ha! Ha! Ha! 'Gee! I sure hopes something like this happens to MY dad (brother, sister, mom, son, daughter or ... ME!). Wouldn't THAT just be the funniest thing EVER!!!! Americans are sick mother fuckers. Hey, you guys that had some kind feelings for this man: Thank you. You are educated and kind. Please know that you are only in the small 5% of stupid Americans. As for the photographer who waited in the shadows for his pic? There is a place for this guy in the white house.
From: azdollarbill [Jim Jones]
Date: 28-Dec-2005 15:10
From: kareeshus [Okana] Date: 27-Dec-2005 06:12 Apparently Rotten doesn't like Ananova. Also, neither does any other website in the world. Does anyone know why Ananova is so universally hated? There must be a reason, and I really really sorta want to know what it is. ----------------------------------------------------------------- In all of your whole life, you will never know. Nobody will tell you. You will go to your grave never knowing. Now isn't that just ever so rotteny ?
From: wetkitty [[Guenhwyvar]]
Date: 30-Dec-2005 01:56
My favorite shot is when he banged his nuts on the handlebars!
Updated: 31-Dec-2005 04:07
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