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Shakespeare (Abridged)
MSNBC | Submitted by: snatch
Thinking about the early parts of the play, Bartz said, "The only thing I can think of that she might have found objectionable is that there is the use of the word penis, twice."
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From: elfboy
[blinky7]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 15:10
"T'was Brillig, and the Slithy toth, Did Gyre & Gimble in the Wabe, All Mismsy were the Borogroves, And Moms rath Outgrabed." As per Lewis Carroll's nonsense poem,"The Jabberwocky". Shakespeare, although a masterful author, is oft-times incomprehensible to addle-pated adolescents, hell, sometimes even to me. If you think Shakespear's a task, try to read Chaucer's "Canterbury Tales" in the original Olde English- to wit.."Whan that Apprill shoures soote, the droote of March giveth sure resoolta,& bath-ed every vein in sweet liquor, in which engendered is the flor. When Zepherus eke with his swete brethe, " I haven't thought about this since 7th grade, possibly am mis-quoting. Shakespeare quote-"First, we kill all the Lawyers" Got off work early, gonna kill a case tonite. 12 oz. at a clip. First? Like I care.
From: theallseeingear [Bavid Dyrden]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 15:15
There are only 2 explanations why she reacted like that: [1] sixth-graders are completely unaware of the existence of penis [2] the teacher is completely deprived of penis
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 15:36
Shakespeare through the use of football, swordplay and hip-hop music. ------------------------------ Why niggerize the bard? He'd spin in his grave......Stratford would collectively weep. 'Out..Damn Spot!' But to use a dick as the culprit is silly......ever read Titus Andronicus? It ain't pretty. I now feel like quoting Antony's oration at Caesar's funeral...but I'll hold it.
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 15:38
bard bounced was the cap i gave it. elfling=wm. and chaucer are, in part, why i blither as i am wont it's no secret terribly, terribly rotten this-tsk tsk= shakespeare is always in order thicky nob educators
From: larry
[larry]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 15:47
“I just thought it was over some of our kids’ heads and it wasn’t appropriate for our kids...” So which is it? Over their heads, or so inappropriate that they might understand it?
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 15:55
If you think Shakespear's a task, try to read Chaucer's "Canterbury Tales" in the original Olde English ------------------------------------------- I've done it. Try Beowulf. It's even more demanding. There is nothing literarily sacriligious about reading ancient texts in a modern context as long as the meaning is obscured as little as possible. I cannot read Homer in ancient greek.....nor I daresay can 90-odd percent of modern greeks. I could not have read Cervantes and Tolstoy...or Sartre and Sun Tzu, Caesar's commentaries or Dante without translation. One of my great regrets intellectually is not to have done languages....I chose science; we can't do everything. I took some French, I can read it mostly..I know a lot of the verbs, I even took a semester of Latin which is totally lost from prodigious memory. But I know English...........and that's the BIG ONE!
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 16:17
beowulf? youre joking-eh? and catcher in the rye confounds you as well?
From: csi [can't stand idiots]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 16:31
more dumbing down of Amerikans teachers don't teach. kids don't learn.
From: elfboy
[blinky7]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 16:59
Hi, all, 3/4 thru that case of beer, my tortured back is feeling better. M<y typing skills, however, seem to've suffered. Be that as it may, reading the classics in the orgiginal language is always a challenge. Latin, & Greek all the more-so. I do, however, still think Chaucerian Olde English is just about damn near incomprehensible, just like Snatchy's bogus celtic rants. "Aye nae kin ken wha'e ye futtin' aboot." I mean, come on. Sorry, Snatch, but if you're gonna post here, do it in English. Please. What;s the use in posting, if no-one will understand you? "I nae kinna fit anadan na briona." See what I mean, Love, Elfboy, King of Salsa/Guardian of the English Language. PS- Fuck Islam.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 17:10
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch] Date: 3-Oct-2007 16:17 beowulf? youre joking-eh? and catcher in the rye confounds you as well? ------------- In the original olde anglo-saxon Beowulf can be a chore. Catcher in the Rye is children's fare....Maxwell Caulfield. Don't contradict me cunt-rag.......wrap your fat sausage-like fingers about some James Joyce. (Finnigan's Wake or Ulysses) Or perhaps Grimmelshausen's 'Simplicissimus'. Read 'A Tale of Two Cities'.......it might just give you a more realistic conceit of yourself.
From: elfboy
[blinky7]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 17:35
"It was the Best of Backs, it was the the worst of Backs.." Oh, dear God, It hurts so much. Back to Tubby-Time, for a nice long soak. Hope it helps. However, FUCK ISLAM. I sorta feel better. FUCK MOHAMMED, damned camel-fucker. Also Jewish. ]
From: absintheredux
[Green Death]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 18:08
DD "O tell me all about Anna Livia! I want to hear all about Anna Livia. Well, you know Anna Livia? Yes, of course, we all know Anna Livia. Tell me all. Tell me now. You’ll die when you hear." ------------------------------------ "Sorry, Snatch, but if you're gonna post here, do it in English. Please. What;s the use in posting, if no-one will understand you?" Elfboy, some of us have no problems reading "Snatchinese". We enjoy her sense of humour. What I don't enjoy one bit is for some noobie to come and tell us what and how to post, silly boy.
From: teratomarty
[Self-made man]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 18:21
Shakespeare is "inappropriate and suggestive"! That's part of what makes his works classics of English literature: it's got everything. The bawd of the hand is on the very prick of noon, bitch! I honestly don't care what method they have to use to get the kids acquainted with these stories. If they like them well enough, they might even bother to read the originals. For myself, I'd prefer graphic novels to performance art, but whatever. I was thinking earlier today about the central role that comic books had in my learning the English language. It's a lot easier to pick words up in context when you've got pictures to fill in the gaps.
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 18:27
debbil=yer insecurities are dripping everyfar i'm certain you are aware i have read far and wide=before ye's were kickin the slats outa your crib-and me but 2 years your senior-eh. step back and kiss yerself. you'll ne'er catch me=i'm th gingerhaired brotchen i'll allow ye to play heap big whompum-but dinna mistake my nature entirely - elfsack-ye seem to ha understood me well enough-now shut the frug up afore i skullfruck ye;s with a dead pibble
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 18:38
a pibble is a bigger, smellier, hairier, tribble
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 18:58
Graphic novels Marty.......? I thought only Spartan women gave birth to real men? Sin City? I actually liked some of the Conan the Barbarian shit they did....that Hyborean wielded a mean-ass sword.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 19:04
'll allow ye to play heap big whompum-but dinna mistake my nature entirely ----------- You won't 'allow' me to do shit you pretentious cocksucker. Mistake me.......and you're all done. Wanna try? (might be fun!)
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 19:45
From: aulduron [Aulduron] Date: 3-Oct-2007 18:52 I've never understood the attraction to Shakespeare. ---------------- The prose not only melodic.....(in plays mostly executed via iambic pentameter in a five beat count and in sonnets rhyming couplets)....but also very pertinent to the day. And to this day......sure there has been technological advancement, but how little man and his foibles have changed. Plus Ca Change eh? Even with his histories, (my faves) although they may extend to Julius Caesar, Antony & Cleopatra, Henry V, Richard III, you get a sense that Shakespeare is an oracle of human nature.......a seer into the minds of men if you will. It's quite instructive and worthwhile. Try it yourself Auldy.
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 19:45
i beg to differ but i do allow- it is completely and utterly within my power to take you down several notches and i have always done so with little if no bloodshed. that can be amended. i much prefer watching you pomp your circumstances around like little lord fauntleroy -it pleases me to see you miss a step and blunder thru basic training with much ado afut nothing you are my wee cherub to tease and tickle as i wish you neednt agree- you do belong in the service of a queen= brings a tear to my thigh let the banshees be set free as i kin ye must= insufferable toerag that ye are
From: ciaochowbella [I didn't do it and I wasn't there when it happened]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:14
DD, Shakespeare wrote for common folk. I bet he'd be delighted to have his works translated for modern ears. There's also the theory that ol' Willie was a black man, too. Of course, you'll deny that.....
From: noracejusthuman
[Alien From Earth]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:17
As a college "educated" professional I realize the IMPORTANCE of the "classics" and "great poetry". I've READ and studied many of these Great works of history..But to tell you the truth, as I've "matured".. it's all a bit Pretentious sounding to me. "oh Yes, it's one of the most "famous Classic pieces from the period" ..really means..Oh yes I skimmed thru the Highlights, and read the cliff notes so i can SOUND like I got through this boring long winded crap of a 376 page book.. I am WELL READ indeed,,
From: niebelung [oregonian]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:21
They should have stopped the performance because it was a fuckin' stupid concept, not because of the language used. Even an education major should have had enough brains to see that.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:26
Pompous, bloated nonsense........nobody can make head nor tail of your inchoate, fractured, semi-literate posts. (but I can) Your assertions are riddled with non-sequiturs and vague, rambling musings about fuck-all..reminds me of an Alan Ginsburg poem. If I didn't know you were clever, I would proclaim in stentorian terms your obvious condition of non compos mentis. Fuck it.....I'll leave it there; I'd as soon not bite too deep if I can avoid it. We can probably do without.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 21:12
From: niebelung [oregonian] Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:21 They should have stopped the performance because it was a fuckin' stupid concept, not because of the language used. Even an education major should have had enough brains to see that. ------------------------------------------------------- Amen. And you are partially correct Bella in that Shakespeare wished a wide circulation upon the commoners (true)...but I wonder how many ponying up their ha'pence understood most of the verbiage. I think he played to an Elizabethan court and a learned aristocracy that paid his way. His Richard III for example is a major fucking hatchet job....whilst Henry can do no wrong. Which would obviously please a Tudor monarch. 'May we cram within this wooden O the very casks that did affright the air at Agincourt'?
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 21:22
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:26 ------------------------- The person that post was directed to knows who they are.
From: huwatng [Hue]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 22:29
I'm impressed. No, really. You people are way smart. I mean, Hue smart.
From: absintheredux
[Green Death]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 22:40
From: niebelung [oregonian] Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:21 They should have stopped the performance because it was a fuckin' stupid concept, not because of the language used. Even an education major should have had enough brains to see that. ________________________________________ I presume that I am very limited, or fail to be clairvoyant, as I have never been able to evaluate the worth of a theatrical concept without actually attending a performance. Congratulations on your rare gift. ---------------------------------------- The worship of the "Classics" has managed to mummify the vitality of the works of W.S. as well as those of Ben Johnson and Marlowe. The same thing happened to the French classical tragedies until Jean Vilars and Maria Casares began touring with the TNP. The "uneducated" audiences took to "Le Cid" and other works of Racine, Coreille, and Moliere when presented as living theatre rather than museum pieces. Taxidermy is a poor introduction to bird watching. DD - The populace loved the stuff. "Educators" seldom tell their captive audiences about the realities of the Globe, where women carrying a slop bucket and a large cape would hawk "A pee! A pee! A penny a poop". As far as Richard III and the Histories are concerned I am 100% with you -- When it came to the Tudors, Willie would have had a broken nose if the then Royalty had taken a sharp turn. For one of the best Slashers ever I give Titus Andronicus a first prize (Duchess of Malfi, and Edward II "The Troublesome Reign and Lamentable Death of Edward the Second, King of England, with the Tragical Fall of Proud Mortimer" do come close).
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 22:54
I must concur my dear with Edward II being a somewhat harrowing piece..........when a red-hot poker is thrust into your very entrails; it may be a scenario one mayst just remember with crystal clarity!
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 3-Oct-2007 23:47
From: absintheredux [Green Death] Date: 3-Oct-2007 23:04 DD -- "Is this the arse that launched a thousand shites" -------------------------- You naughty woman. Marlowe......actually would probably larf....if he wasn't busy being knifed to death in a whorehouse brawl! (was it the jew of malta?) Perhaps Tamberlane.
From: abluecommunist
[Red is for republicans, dammit!]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 00:52
It is better to be on hand with ten men, than absent with ten thousand. -Tamerlane I love genocidal warlords. They have so much...character. Building pyramids of skulls taken from 100,000 infidel scum, now that's how a real man deals out intimidation. Why don't we see anything cool like this anymore? Timur had it down over 500 years ago. Shock and awe.
From: wulfgarthewhite [Black to White]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 01:34
Out, out brief penis! Is this a penis I see before me? A penis! A penis! My kingdom for a penis! Neither a burrower nor a penis be.
From: larry
[larry]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 03:41
From: doesshe [ever shut up, that DS?] Date: 4-Oct-2007 02:11 I have the same birthday as William Shakespeare. --------------------------------- Which means you're going to die on your birthday, you know...
From: larry
[larry]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 03:47
My favorite Shakespearian plays: Much Ado About Penis Penis and Juliet Penis Andronicus Penis of Athens Two Penises of Verona MacPenis As You Lick It Penis of Errors A Midsummer Night's Penis Taming of the Penis The Penis Troilus and Penis Coriolpenis Julius Penis Measure for Measure
From: jaybegood
[Sir Robin of D'Hood]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 07:30
Chaucer wrote NOT in "Old English" but in Middle English. I had the good fortune at Ole Miss to have a professor who was quite adept at reading Middle English and to hear the writing of Chaucer correctly spoken makes all the difference in the world. As far as William Shakesper of Stratford all he ever wrote was his signature (maybe) five or six times. That's all we know. Anything else is pure conjecture. William DeVere the 7th(?)Earl of Bacon wrote the plays we now ascribe to Bill of Stratford-upon-Avon. Beowulf remains indecipherable and a cruel punishment for All college Freshmen.
From: loveto
[Jill Awf]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 11:01
It's a real pity when educators are afraid to teach their children. Even naughty language and onstage fucking can be opportunities for education. The teacher who had such 'sensitive' 6th graders had an ever greater opportunity. Too bad she was afraid to properly do her job. As for hip-hop music, I think the author was referring to the 'Othello Rap.' For anyone who hasn't seen the show, DO SO. I saw RSC (Reduced Shakespeare Company) do it about fifteen years ago, when I was in high school, then promptly joined the 'Shakespeare Troupe.' Good stuff. I don't care HOW Shakespeare is kept alive or modernized or continuously made relevant or challenging. I even like the boring period costume performances. Just keep doing it. If ya don't like it, don't watch. But don't be a prick and keep other people from art.
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 11:20
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 3-Oct-2007 21:22 From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 3-Oct-2007 20:26 ------------------------- The person that post was directed to knows who they are. --- no they don't narwhal teats
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 12:10
Excuse my testes-ness my Natchy-nest. BTW.......narwhals have no protruding appendages; allowing them to more easily navigate upside down by sliding along the underside of great ice-sheets. It would be instructive to watch a pair mate. (there is also a rumor that Edward II was killed by having a scalding narwhal horn rudely thrust into his well-worn puckered shit-hole!) Thou poisonous bunch-backed toad!
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 12:30
your testes will never have an excuse me thinks- to be a man or to beowulf=that is ze question
From: absintheredux
[Green Death]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 15:03
From: jaybegood [Sir Robin of D'Hood] Date: 4-Oct-2007 07:30 William DeVere the 7th(?)Earl of Bacon wrote the plays we now ascribe to Bill of Stratford-upon-Avon. ________________________________________ Not that old canard again. First, there was no "Earl of Bacon", Edward de Vere was the 17th Earl of *Oxford*. Bacon and Marlowe are the two other usual alternate choices (with many more in the wings). All are charming fables started in the 18th century by second rate essayists with way too much time on their hands. Without necromancy, no supported conclusion can be formulated. Time to get a close shave with Occam's razor and accept the simplest explanation: Shakespeare's plays were written by... Shakespeare.
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 15:40
or the duchess of whosie ma fuck or was it lady fugshername ahhh-oui-countess of pembroke-mary sidney herbert if it's good enough for derick jacobi=tis good enough for me
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 15:50
Jacobi was brilliant in I Claudius. He also narrated Branaugh's Henry V. 'That hath not noble lustre in your eyes. I see you stand like greyhounds in the slips, Straining upon the start. The game's afoot: Follow your spirit, and upon this charge Cry 'God for Harry, England, and Saint George!'
From: snatchvondrippy [snatch]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 16:12
yer a well known jacobaholic- he was cunning in nanny macphee all i need mention is; narwhals, shaved puss, derek jacobi or bunny's to get yer blood racing
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 4-Oct-2007 16:56
all i need mention is; narwhals, shaved puss, derek jacobi or bunny's to get yer blood racing True.......I'm also a Jacobite! (And Jackalopes are urban legend) Day of the Jackal.....born of a jackal.....Rickard Jaekel Springheel Jack...or just the facts jack?
Updated: 10-Oct-2007 14:04
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BUT I will nEVER speak ill of cute little bunnies, OF THAT... you can be sure. 