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Lucky Pussy
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: anonymous
"A kitten in South Florida has amazed veterinarians by surviving a trip through a working wood chipper, according to a Local 6 News report."
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From: theallseeingear [Bavid Dyrden]
Date: 6-Jul-2006 17:25
DAMN! The witness is still alive and ready to meow in court!
From: wackojacko8 [WTF?]
Date: 6-Jul-2006 17:47
Hey, further proof that cats have 9 lives, this one gots 8 more.
From: julezeebub [jules]
Date: 6-Jul-2006 19:19
First a hamster, now a kitten, what's with the critters and the wood chippers? It's Fargo for animals. You got some serious thrill issues, dude.
From: julezeebub [jules]
Date: 6-Jul-2006 20:37
We had an extremely stupid cat once. I'm surprised he lived as long as he did. When confronted by another cat, he would literally scream and shit where he stood, then run away while the other cat was standing there with a WTF?look on it's face. That's not the stupid part. On more than one occasion he ran straight into a chain link fence, trying to get at the squirrel on the other side. He died stupid. My mother would always honk the horn and chase any cats out from under the car. This one seemed to be leaving, then stopped right behind (or in front of) the tire. Cat suicide. He was memorable, though. His name was Tiny. For his brain, I guess.
From: biro
[yes?]
Date: 6-Jul-2006 21:04
 This makes me really happy! I am sadly a bleeding heart animal lover. It comes with living in Santa Barbara, there seem to be a lot here.
From: jenasaurusx
[Awesome!]
Date: 6-Jul-2006 21:22
Jules, great story! Tiny - ha ha! Our neighbor just ran over their dog the same way. I have killed two dogs. One was when we were rushing to get to a meth lab fire (what? I lived in the desert). A weiner dog just came out of nowhere and splat. We just kept going (it happened at the bottom of the driveway) because there was a frickin house on fire and no one else was there and our house was up the hill from it. Later we were standing there watching the firefighters do their thing and the owner of the house came up with the dog held in her shirt and she was all crying. Oh, it was terrible. She said something about the firetrucks and we just kept our mouths shut.
From: skumbunny [rockin' the ganj]
Date: 6-Jul-2006 22:36
Damn, I want to adopt that lucky little bastard. Poor guy deserves a chance after going through that!
From: scarfface
[Schmutamongus]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 01:36
From: julezeebub [jules] First a hamster, now a kitten, what's with the critters and the wood chippers? It's Fargo for animals. Thanks for that one!
From: tiredoflurking
[Sean]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 01:48
Originally posted this just below alexthegreat's post with the hello kitty pic, but i had 3 question marks after "survive this" maybe this will work now. From: tiredoflurking [Sean] Date: 6-Jul-2006 20:20 damn! i wonder how many of its nine lives the cat used up to survive this? had a kitten that wasn't so lucky when i was a kid. came home from school to find my dad tamping down the earth on a tiny grave. the little kitten had been looking for a shady place to nap and we had an electric mower, so no noisy pull-start to wake up or warn anything sleeping underneath. bad combination.
From: haalonbaalona [AKA MrsSumDumFuk]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 01:53
From: alexthegreat [My girlfriend doesn't know about my boyfriend] Date: 6-Jul-2006 20:31 ... I had a kitten a couple years ago... My sisters took to dressing him in doll clothes... I came home from school one day, and my dad said that my cat was gone... I never found out what happened to him... I miss Lil' Satan...  ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alex, your sister probably microwaved Lil' Satan. Life's a bitch.
From: blahblahblowme
[my inner child is a mean lil fucker]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 02:50
Lol we have two cats, it always seems that she is not satisfied with one. She gets two everytime. The weird par about this story, is they are a long haired and a short haired. I swear to Christ they came from a LSD test lab. They are little relentless pricks. Their names are rowdy and ruffy. Very fitting I guess. Now if I could just convince her to give me a little pussy every once in a while:-(
From: ozymandias [King of Kings]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 03:01
Didn't hurt Steve Buscemi none. Me doubt power of wood chipper. Me go in for closer look. A lucky pussy is a licked pussy. Ask any lesbo. The difference between a lesbian and a Ritz is that one is a snack cracker and the other is a crack snacker.
From: seeteufel [ciccio]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 07:58
I hate cats! With a vengeance! Having said that, my daughter brought home a little beast, intelligent as hell, would not scratch the post I had to buy, nor the cheap kitchen chairs, instinctively knew the most expensive antiques. Daughter left, but considerately left the beast. Had to cut a cat door for her because she had just about clawed through the front door. After 12 miserable years, two strokes of luck. The first, I left for work that morning on outside the front door the beast was lying dead, stone cold. The second, it happened on a garbage day and I had time to double bag her before the truck came. Having said that, if that cat had managed to go through a wood chipper unharmed, I would have demanded a repeat performance.
From: heywood [Jablowme]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 11:10
is there such thing as an unlucky pussy?
From: chowdapipe [Dr. Nuge]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 11:39
Started my car up one fine morning and heard a strange "Thump" noise followed by a "Snap" noise and the car died. Opened the hood and found a dead cat in 2 parts and a broken fan belt and a lot of goo. I liked that car.
From: jenasaurusx
[Awesome!]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 12:31
From: heywood [Jablowme] Date: 7-Jul-2006 11:10 is there such thing as an unlucky pussy? ********* The one that gets a visit from you? Paruhmp bump! Just kidding! Come on. You left yourself wide open.
From: heywood [Jablowme]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 14:08
From: jenasaurusx [Awesome!] Date: 7-Jul-2006 12:31 From: heywood [Jablowme] Date: 7-Jul-2006 11:10 is there such thing as an unlucky pussy? ********* The one that gets a visit from you? Paruhmp bump! Just kidding! Come on. You left yourself wide open. ***************************8 Sorry, I made a typo. I meant to write: Is there such thing as Jena not having a rancid pussy? I think not! Sorry aout the confusion...I'm not a very good typist.
From: misterjeff [(actually it's Steve)]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 14:54
Hooray for this kitty! I'd like to see any puppy survive something like this. Puppies can't even get away from dudes shooting at them with crossbows a foot away!
From: portajohn316 [portajohn316]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 15:23
This reminds me of a pussy I've been seeing a lot lately. Mmmmmm pussy. It was really glad to see me. I could tell 'cause her clit was so freaking swollen. I can't get it off my mind. Even cats in woodchipper stories bring back to her pussy. Prettiest one I've ever seen. Gotta see it tonight. Mmmm cats in woodchipper stories. Rotten to the core baby!
From: haalonbaalona [AKA MrsSumDumFuk]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 16:42
From: portajohn316 [portajohn316] Date: 7-Jul-2006 15:23 This reminds me of a pussy I've been seeing a lot lately. Mmmmmm pussy. It was really glad to see me. I could tell 'cause her clit was so freaking swollen. I can't get it off my mind. Even cats in woodchipper stories bring back to her pussy. Prettiest one I've ever seen. Gotta see it tonight. Mmmm cats in woodchipper stories. Rotten to the core baby! ----------------------------------------------------------------- Porta Potty: I'm convinced you haven't seen a non-rubber pussy in eons but keep up the faith! haa haaa haaa
From: julezeebub [jules]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 17:52
I want to see Steve Buscemi play the guy with the chainsaws and the teddy bear. Or maybe Tim Roth. Actually, Tim Roth looks a little like the guy who threw the pig's head into the mosque.
From: dirtylittlegirl [Rori]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 18:13
someone has a sense of humor...naming it Chipper and all. Ha Ha God must love that pussy.
From: thedusthunter [patrick dowdy]
Date: 7-Jul-2006 23:31
He did fall asleep. Natural selection came pretty close to claiming another victim this time. That would be a fun site, Darwin Awards: Animal Stories.
From: sadday [_]
Date: 8-Jul-2006 08:06
I wonder how many kittens they had to feed into the chipper before one finally made it through.
From: portajohn316 [portajohn316]
Date: 8-Jul-2006 13:41
MrsSumDumFuk please post a picture of your pussy so we can discuss further. No God damn cat, kitten or feline of any type pix either. Your pussy. Right here. Chop-chop!
From: haalonbaalona [AKA MrsSumDumFuk]
Date: 8-Jul-2006 19:22
From: portajohn316 [portajohn316] Date: 8-Jul-2006 13:41 MrsSumDumFuk please post a picture of your pussy so we can discuss further. No God damn cat, kitten or feline of any type pix either. Your pussy. Right here. Chop-chop! ------------------------------------------------------------ Porta Potty: No. I'm concerned that upon viewing it, you'll rape the frozen turkey in your freezer- can't be party to that, Yo'.
From: portajohn316 [portajohn316]
Date: 10-Jul-2006 09:34
There's a frozen turkey in the freezer?? Damn, bitch get to cooking!!
From: jackoff [jake]
Date: 12-Jul-2006 13:31
Hey alexthegreat, tell me you retard how much you got off on putting baby animals in the microwave, the blender or the frying pan? I noticed that none of the kittens are the same which leads me to believe that those babies met their demise, if I'm wrong, prove otherwise. You are a sick and demented soul that gets off on hurting the innocents because you have no dick to abuse. I hear jerking off with tweezers is a hard talent to master. Nice going you horse humping bitch! I'd say put your dick through a wood chipper bit I hear it misses the little bitty twigs.
From: thelurker [I lurk in the shadows]
Date: 12-Jul-2006 16:42
From: jackoff [jake] Date: 12-Jul-2006 13:31 Hey alexthegreat, tell me you retard how much you got off on putting baby animals in the microwave, the blender or the frying pan? I noticed that none of the kittens are the same which leads me to believe that those babies met their demise, if I'm wrong, prove otherwise. You are a sick and demented soul that gets off on hurting the innocents because you have no dick to abuse. I hear jerking off with tweezers is a hard talent to master. Nice going you horse humping bitch! I'd say put your dick through a wood chipper bit I hear it misses the little bitty twigs. -------------------------- I don't think he was the one that did that to the kittens. I think he just found the pictures online.
Updated: 15-Jul-2006 15:02
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