|
Muslims In Space
News Corporation | Submitted by: FozziePubes
"The reason we formulated guidelines for Muslims in space is because we wanted to ensure our astronaut could fully concentrate on his mission, without having to worry about how he should perform his religious obligations in space."
|
From: wiegehtesdir [Jimmy Jingo]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 15:36
Guidelines for Performing Islamic Rites at the International Space Station.... Great, and now for the companion book: Guidelines for Performing Pagan Rites at the International Space Station,
From: guilty [Guilty as charged]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 15:58
Fuck....send them all to space.
From: pussypounder [deeppenetrator]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:11
wow, most Muslims I knew ( when I was in Iraq) were still working on the butt and left hand theory.
From: csi [can't stand idiots]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:13
hope he takes along walk outside the space station and never comes back.
From: nomdeplume [NomDeGuerre]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:15
"...and could not fully kneel on the ground." Don't go on a *space* mission, then, you dumbshit.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:17
As one poster so succintly put it.....send 'em all into space. (with a jew under each arm....for as long as needed anyway!)
From: mljohns00 [Radical Conservative]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:24
Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!
From: pontiuspilatus
[Pontius Phallus Pilatius]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:28
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:17 As one poster so succintly put it.....send 'em all into space. (with a jew under each arm....for as long as needed anyway!) ---------------- Hahahaha! Please transplant jewish brains into muslim bodies first, and vice versa, for hilarity to ensue.
From: theidiot [thevillageidiotiam]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:36
to which position will these muslims be facing when they face MECCA for prayer purposes in space?..is that towards the Moon or towards Saturn?
From: gargoyle1
Date: 6-Oct-2007 16:52
Mooslums will never get into space, they'll blow up on the launch pad. So why bother with this book?
From: slyslick [andwicked]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 17:04
Which way is Mecca? Who really fucking cares?
From: darkwolf [the Wolf with the nasty bite]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 17:31
Only the Muslims would worry about stupid shit like this. Only religion I know that demands you have your ass in the air while you pray. They look like ostriches doing that.
From: pontiuspilatus
[Pontius Phallus Pilatius]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 17:39
From: darkwolf [the Wolf with the nasty bite] Date: 6-Oct-2007 17:31 Only the Muslims would worry about stupid shit like this. Only religion I know that demands you have your ass in the air while you pray. They look like ostriches doing that. ----------------- Muslims sniff the front man's ass. Jews shake back and forth. Why the fuck are they all so nauseating? Oh to be punished for their sins.
From: fucktardmama [fook-me]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 18:29
What would happen if Muslims are on a space mission and they ran into the Pigs in Space from the Muppets? Then they wouldn't have to fucking worry about where the fuck Mecca is!
From: mljohns00 [Radical Conservative]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 19:52
From: jaybegood [Sir Robin of D'Hood] Date: 6-Oct-2007 17:36 Pull down your pants Will Robinson, pull down your pants! -------------------------------------------------- Wasn't that from Episode 14 of "Lust in Space"?
From: abluecommunist
[Red is for republicans, dammit!]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 19:56
Christians and Muslims are simply Jews who believe the prophet has already come. Jews simply look at the prospective Messiahs and go "nope, not him" before returning to their devious plotting to rule the world. </sarcasm> I'll see and accept the Messiah when he comes down from the clouds and obliterates an army with a thunderbolt. Until then, god can shove it.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 19:58
Give it a rest Pilate.....by 'rotten' tradition we leave old arguments behind when the stories turn over. My positions on things are known to all; but take a bit of advice, if you make a cult of any single subject you soon become a bore. Rather like the jews and the 'holocaust'. Wakarimasu Ka?
From: pontiuspilatus
[Pontius Phallus Pilatius]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 20:57
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Oct-2007 19:58 Give it a rest Pilate.....by 'rotten' tradition we leave old arguments behind when the stories turn over. My positions on things are known to all; but take a bit of advice, if you make a cult of any single subject you soon become a bore. Rather like the jews and the 'holocaust'. Wakarimasu Ka? ------------------- Errr, right. If I also have to lick the fat n!gger loving cunt just for the sake of it, then I just got more than I bargained for here. 
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 20:59
A muzzy Ron Jeremy?  BTW....there is a cool English band monikered 'Porcupine Tree'. (try 'In Absentia' for an album primer..good stuff)
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 21:06
Post what you want bro.........I always certainly do. As far as n1gger loving white bitches go.......I have absolutely no respect for them whatsoever and consider them scum. As everyone knows. (even though 90% if them are fat and ugly) Party on Garth!
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 22:01
From: daredevil [CameronVale] Date: 6-Oct-2007 15:10 Too bad Steve Irwin is dead.....I can see it now: Episode 34 : ‘The Ghetto Ape’. "And this dangerous primate, close relation to the Silverback is in his ghetto environment constantly robbing banks, selling narcotics, pimping ho's and looking for his favourite prey.....white bitches". "Careful now....we don't want to disturb this savage beast whilst he dispenses crack; these are violent creatures extremely adverse to personal responsibility". "Crikey....he's seen us"! I'll just get me .357 and blow a great hole in his back....just to slow 'im down of course. Crikey...we've killed 'im! Unfortunately, these lazy beasts are over-prevelant in society as they breed indiscriminately and abandon their young at birth. Some people believe these animals can be domesticated by giving them undeserved positions in the DMV and in the bus-driving community…but if you observe closely; that mythology is exploded with great alacrity. "Even more dangerous than stingrays they are mate! Well...that's it for today Boys & Girls. I hope you have gained insight into the world of the Ghetto Ape....an amazingly dangerous and ignorant beast inhabiting the lower echelons of the animal kingdom. And likely to remain there." "See ya next week on “Crocodile Hunter. Ta-Ta!" "Crikey"!
From: ubermonkey [Ubermonkey]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 22:23
Watch me stick my thumb up his bung hole!
From: noracejusthuman
[Alien From Earth]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 23:00
Coming up later tonight of FOX..Love in the BUNKER...WHO SHOT AH?...Last WEEK'S crazy episode Part I ..After Erick gives Heinrich a "haircut" , Eva notices that the bunker needs some "pink"..meanwhile guess who ends up in the cooler? Yes ..Stephen ...Part II begins with EVEN more laughs... Lovable "Puntze" from Vienna shows up for tea. Adolf finds puppy doo in his slipper and decides to invade Antarctica. Will Eva convince Heinrich to "slipper" some pink? And What about the paperhanger carrying that briefcase bomb? Don't miss the Incredible Conclusion..Tonight at 11.
From: huwatng [Hue]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 23:21
 the first raghead in space. possibly the last.
From: rotteneggs13
[a bakers dozen]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 23:51
“Musslims in space” Sounds like a Cheech & Chong movie RMFAO They’ll barnstorm the rocket ship into a skyscraper all in the name of allah. Where's Mecca? The Coriolis effect is screwin' with our navigation in order to pray. Mecca, UGH! allahashish crackbar
From: alanone [Alan One]
Date: 6-Oct-2007 23:52
Please ... please ...   Oh, never mind. Muslims are far more more talented at blowing up an airplane or spacecraft than they are at building one.
From: theallseeingear [Bavid Dyrden]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 00:37
I think a good Muslim should never go into space because - and I'm not kidding here - the Koran states that the Earth is surrounded by solid transparent spheres, each one carrying a planet around. Seriously.
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 02:30
From: rotteneggs13 [a bakers dozen] Date: 7-Oct-2007 00:08 They'll try reverse engineering They can put Muhhamud back together. ------------------ Listen Eggs-on-Toast.......reverse engineering is quite different than what you describe. What it involves is taking a pre-existing patent and working backwards to discover how the patented mechanisms work.......then plotting your own model based on the patented one; but with minor changes which can pass the criteria of 'novel' to the patent office and market a product to compete with a rival using his own technology. Clever eh? There are tech companies that specialize in just that. But they don't last...without true innovation, good R&D, and sound managerial skill..your shit won't work.
From: huwatng [Hue]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 09:48
"The astronauts will also visit the International Space Station, which circles the earth 16 times in 24 hours, so another thorny question is how to pray five times a day as required by Islam, she said. Muslims also have to turn towards Mecca to pray and working out which direction that will be while hovering above the earth might also be challenging." If you cannot find Mecca from the Space Station five times a day, then WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN SPACE?! Seriously, if the Malaysian Space Agency expects anyone to take it seriously, they have to have, well, rocket scientists around. Maybe they'll use GPS? On-Star? Windows Local Live? Rock fucking ignorant muslim assholes. Jesus fucking Christ. Angel Salazar! Angel Salazar! Angel Salazar! Angel Salazar!
From: himmlerismyhero [Brad]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 11:13
I think the Muslims wouldn't be so bad if the jews were gone and we didn't help the bastards. Just send all the jews and about half the Muslims to the sun and the world would be a better place.
From: nomdeplume [NomDeGuerre]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 13:20
Kudos, 'eggs, for picking up my 'knigger' vernacular.
From: pontiuspilatus
[Pontius Phallus Pilatius]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 16:27
From: himmlerismyhero [Brad] Date: 7-Oct-2007 11:13 I think the Muslims wouldn't be so bad if the jews were gone and we didn't help the bastards. Just send all the jews and about half the Muslims to the sun and the world would be a better place. ------------ And why would you keep the other half? There is enough dog shit in the streets as it is. Send all jews and arabs onto a seven-up mission. Give them books to comfort them. Please make sure there is not enough fuel on board to get them back.
From: elfboy
[blinky7]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 17:11
Am I the only one who is reminded of the end of Mel Brooks's move "History of the World,pt.2.? You know, near the end, with all the funny stuff, Like "JEWS IN SPACE -ace-ace-ace" "SEE! Hitler on ice! "We're Muslims, in Space!, Zooming around protecting the muslim race! Time for an ICBM. "Fire when ready, Gridley" Alla-whostolemychocolatebar?
From: rotteneggs13
[a bakers dozen]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 17:28
From: nomdeplume [NomDeGuerre] Date: 7-Oct-2007 13:20 Kudos, 'eggs, for picking up my 'knigger' vernacular. -----+-----+----- I 'sniggered' when I read your post. Hee Hee 'kkknigger'
From: daredevil [CameronVale]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 19:27
Be more effusive in your approbation Eggy......praise should never be niggardly applied!
From: ciaochowbella [I didn't do it and I wasn't there when it happened]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 20:58
I would think that if you got the amazing and very rare opportunity to go to space, you might just be able to put your religion on hold for the duration of the trip and enjoy the experience and learn as much as possible. My grandfather said it best: "There are some people so heavenly minded as to be of no earthly good."
From: wulfgarthewhite [Black to White]
Date: 7-Oct-2007 21:27
"Pigs in Space" was in better taste - and better tasting. 
From: huwatng [Hue]
Date: 8-Oct-2007 04:55
Abdul-Jabbar! Abdul-Jabbar! Abdul-Jabbar!
From: mcgyver [Steve]
Date: 8-Oct-2007 05:11
I wonder, how would one hijack the international space station. "Release all my brothers in arms and fly me to Mars or I will fart in the CO2 scrubbers"
From: himmlerismyhero [Brad]
Date: 8-Oct-2007 11:09
The reason I would keep half the Muslims is becouse they would help us get rid of (All) the jews and the shitty half of the Muslim becouse the Muslims hate all jews and the Muslims themselves hate each other as well. And after the jews and the others are gone, the rest of the Muslims can be slaves to milk the Oil Tit for us cause white people hate working in the desert. And black people can supervise the {others}.
From: abluecommunist
[Red is for republicans, dammit!]
Date: 8-Oct-2007 12:19
I think a better way to fuck the atmosphere up on the ISS would be to introduce large quantities of LSD into the available air supply. Lets see how useful the place is when all the inhabitants are tripping balls 24/7. Unless they can get into a space suit and have a large supply of clean oxygen. But the bottled oxygen won't last forever. Sabotage all the CO2 scrubbers so that they are not only defective but cannot be removed without trashing all the nearby equipment. There may be enough oxygen, but there's definitely going to be too much carbon dioxide. Releasing plutonium dust into the station would be a good way to shut it down. Target the ISS with multiple land based microwave emitters, on the order of 250 massive emitters putting out several megawatts of energy each. Watch the inhabitants and anything water based cook. Slowly. Add methyl alcohol to the drinking water. So now not only are the hilbillies blind, but them thar asterknots be blind too.
From: himmlerismyhero [Brad]
Date: 8-Oct-2007 13:40
How about we just make them take a shower. We can clean them the old German way.
From: okshunalljeanyes [Sometimes Not]
Date: 8-Oct-2007 14:41
Hey, in zero-G they could finally have that magic flying carpet that Alladin used.
Updated: 12-Oct-2007 14:47
| 
